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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that the main environment problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction
It is irrefutable fact that these days more and more
people
Use synonyms
 plants and
animals
Use synonyms
 are disappearing .
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon, the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 say that
this
Linking Words
 event
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
 environmental issues.
While
Linking Words
 other
people
Use synonyms
 think that
this
Linking Words
 event
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
another crucial environmental
Replace the adjective
another crucial environmental problem
other crucial environmental problems
show examples
problems
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favour of the latter.
Body paragraph 1
First of all, nowadays
people
Use synonyms
 have
necessity
Add an article
a necessity
the necessity
show examples
 for new spaces.
This
Linking Words
 is the
reason
Use synonyms
,they are cutting down a
lot
Use synonyms
 of forests.
For instance
Linking Words
, giving
report
Correct article usage
a report
show examples
 by the government
pur
Change preposition
of pur
show examples
 country
50
Correct word choice
that 50
show examples
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of forests
cut
Add a missing verb
were cut
show examples
 down.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
vast
Add an article
a vast
the vast
show examples
 amount of
abrogens
Correct your spelling
androgens
 hunt
animals
Use synonyms
. They hunt these
animals
Use synonyms
 for their financial resources and other
things
Use synonyms
.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon,rare
Use synonyms
animals
Change the noun form
animal
show examples
 species extinct.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 view
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
that environmental
problems
Use synonyms
 main reasons are increasing
such
Linking Words
 as greenhouses gases ,
using
Correct word choice
and using
show examples
 a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
vehicle
Change to a plural noun
vehicles
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
Use synonyms
things
Change the determiner
thing
show examples
 is
important
Add an article
an important
show examples
reason
Use synonyms
 for them . Because greenhouses and cars fuels produce harmful gases for
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
Despite
Correct pronoun usage
thisDespite
show examples
 , there is another main
reason
Use synonyms
 for
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
environment
Change noun form
environment's
show examples
 bad condition. It is using a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
plastics
Change the noun form
plastic
show examples
things
Use synonyms
 .
Linking Words
Such as
Correct quantifier usage
As
show examples
 plastic bottles,
dishes
Correct word choice
and dishes
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 is the
reason
Use synonyms
, these days we have a
lot
Use synonyms
 of environmental issues.
Body paragraph 3
In my opinion, using a
Use synonyms
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
 vehicles greenhouses plastic
things
Use synonyms
 really harmful
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
problems
Use synonyms
.Because they produce harmful gases . And
this
Linking Words
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
to
Correct pronoun usage
us to
show examples
problemfor
Correct your spelling
problem for
Use synonyms
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
,it can
negative
Replace the word
negatively
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 healthy.
Conclusion
By way of conclusion,
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
this
Linking Words
 time some
people
Use synonyms
 say that
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
reason
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
Use synonyms
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
problems
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 the
Los
Fix the agreement mistake
Loss
show examples
 of particular species of plants and
animals
Use synonyms
. Yet, others suggest that there are more important environmental
problems
Use synonyms
. In my view,
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
disappearing
Replace the word
disappearance
show examples
 of
plats
Correct your spelling
plants
show examples
 and
animals
Use synonyms
 is not
important
Correct article usage
an important
show examples
 thing
rather
Correct word choice
but rather
show examples
 than crucial
causes
Fix the agreement mistake
cause
show examples
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • endangered species
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • habitat
  • extinction
  • climate change
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • global warming
  • sustainable
  • conservation
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