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Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries, more and more adults choose to continue to live with their parents after they graduate and have found jobs. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh its disadvantages?

#countries #adults #parents #graduate #jobs #trend
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There is a tendency among young university graduates in certain states to stay with their mothers and fathers even after being employed. I believe that staying under one roof with ancestors is a disadvantage. The most serious drawback of living with
parents
Use synonyms
 may be the limitation of freedom.
For example
Linking Words
, the offspring have to comply with
strict
Correct article usage
the strict
show examples
 rules of the household and return home
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
 later than appointed by the owner's time.
Also
Linking Words
, grown-ups with
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
show examples
 degrees ask for permission to invite friends and other guests
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the house. What is more, they cannot listen to
Correct article usage
the
show examples
music they want and as loud as they desire.
In addition
Linking Words
,if they are going to cook, severe restrictions of time and space may spoil the pleasure of consuming the meal. Another major disadvantage may be the fact that the
parents
Use synonyms
 always treat a mature bachelor as a child.
For instance
Linking Words
, they give plenty of advice on the issues which people in their twenties
now
Correct your spelling
know
show examples
 perfectly well. As a
rule
Add a comma
,rule
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
 presume that they have a right to moralise their grown-up child and even tell him off whenever they want. They influence the choice of clothes,food and even beloved ones. To summarise,despite the growing popularity living with
parents
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
adults is more
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 necessity
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 a desirable option.To my mind,
live
Wrong verb form
living
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 with
parents
Use synonyms
 for an adult is
Correct article usage
a humilation
show examples
humilation
Correct your spelling
humiliation
 and
deprivation
Correct article usage
a deprivation
show examples
 of
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 freedom.
Submitted by telo3454 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • intergenerational
  • economic stability
  • cohabitation
  • living arrangements
  • financial autonomy
  • student loans
  • emotional stability
  • transitional phase
  • career development
  • self-reliance
  • independence
  • tension
  • values
  • lifestyles
  • personal space
  • autonomy
  • financial burden
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