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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In most countries, the number of people owning their private car is on the rise. Is this positive or negative development?

#countries #people #car #rise #development
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Nowadays people tend to buy their own
car
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. We realize that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the
number
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 of people who buy their own
car
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 is getting increase. In my view, they are more negative effects on development than positive ones.
Firstly
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, if you have your own
car
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, not only you can go where you what but
also
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 it gives comfort.
For example
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, if you travel
with
Change preposition
in
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 your own
car
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 you can read a book and watch something or you can do whatever you want
instead
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 of
this
Linking Words
 thing is difficult to do it public transport.
On the other hand
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, private
car
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 is more expensive than public transport. Because you have to pay taxes,
also
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 it happens often. I mean that penalty, fuel cost or
car
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 repairing cost and you need a garage.
On the contrary
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, public transport is more friendly budget.
Furthermore
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, private cars make traffic jams so people waste their time queueing for hours. Even though, currently, public transports are more developed in terms of faster.
In addition
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,
private
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the private
show examples
car
Use synonyms
 has a bad effect on the environment. Because
everyday
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an everyday
the everyday
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number
Use synonyms
 of private
car
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 rise. So it causes to increase
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of carbon dioxide. As we know carbon dioxide is harmful to people’s health. And another these type of harmful gas which is released on cars causes to arise in ozone layer problems. And
this
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 is not only people’s problem but
also
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 affects on earth.
As a consequence
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,
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 in the
number
Use synonyms
 of private cars
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
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 us comfort but
also
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
causes some tax problems or negative effects on
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
. So
this
Linking Words
 bad effect leads to negative development.
nt
Correct your spelling
NT
.
Submitted by gulnaar.badalovaa on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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