It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. What are advantages and disadvantages of this development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It
is observe
Change the verb form
is observed

It appears that the form of the verb observe does not work with is in this sentence.

show examples
that with the development of technology,
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can move to remote areas
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
South
Correct article usage
the South

Your article usage with the geographic name South Pole may be incorrect.

show examples
Pole. There are both benefits and drawbacks, but I believe that the merits are
more
Change the word
apply

The double comparative more greater may be repetitive. Consider changing this to the appropriate comparative form.

show examples
greater than
demerits
Correct article usage
the demerits

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with, there are several factors why travelling to remote areas is disadvantageous.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the natural environment can be destroyed.
Scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

produce rubbish during
the
Change the word
their

The word the may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

show examples
travelling, which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

show examples
will
be threw
Change the verb form
be thrown
be throwing

It appears that the form of the verb threw does not work with be in this sentence.

show examples
away by them. It
cause
Change the verb form
causes

It appears that the subject pronoun It and the verb cause are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

show examples
increasing
Correct article usage
an increasing

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
amount of rubbish, and
it
Change the pronoun
its

It appears that the personal pronoun it should be in the possessive form. Consider changing it.

show examples
result
Change the verb form
results

It appears that the subject pronoun it and the verb result are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

show examples
in
environment
Replace the word
environmental

The word environment doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
problems and wildlife
extict
Correct your spelling
extinct

If you don’t want extict to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can be exposed to dangerous events easily. There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
not have systems
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
accidents
Change the noun form
accident

Your sentence appears to use the incorrect form of accidents. Consider changing it to singular.

show examples
prevention from wildlife. If they face dangerous events, they will
difficult
Replace the word
difficulty

The word difficult doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
to receive
someone
Change noun form
someone's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

show examples
help.
These
Correct determiner usage
This

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

show examples
means, people can not be guaranteed their safety during
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
travelling.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, travel to
remote
Add an article
the remote

The noun phrase remote natural environment seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
natural
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments

It seems that environment may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
is beneficial to
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. First of all, they can increase their knowledge. There are
many
Replace the quantifier
much

It appears that the quantifier many does not fit with the uncountable noun wildlife. Consider changing it.

show examples
wildlife
Change preposition
of wildlife

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
,
which
Correct word choice
that

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
they have not known before.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can expand their knowledge
as well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

broaden their horizons.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they can have various experiences.
Tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can have all lifetime of experience. In the case of
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, they can publish new
reaserch
Correct your spelling
research

If you don’t want reaserch to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

paper
Fix the agreement mistake
papers

It seems that paper may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
Such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

experiences will be motivated
Correct pronoun usage
them for

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
for
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
their life. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

there are several demerits, travelling
remote
Change preposition
to remote

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
areas is beneficial.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
scientists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
tourists
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be
encouarged
Correct your spelling
encouraged

If you don’t want encouarged to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

to travel.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote natural environment
  • scientific research
  • climate change
  • environmental preservation
  • economic benefits
  • conservation efforts
  • habitat disruption
  • pollution
  • cultural disruption
  • indigenous populations
  • commercialization
  • safety risks
  • personal enrichment
  • ecosystems
  • awareness
  • appreciation for nature
What to do next:
Look at other essays: