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Band 4.5

Some people think that lawbreakers should be sent to prison. However, others think that better talents among those should be made to work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #lawbreakers #prison #talents #work
It is controversial whether lawbreakers should be sent to prison or whether it is better to choose the talented crowd for good causes and make them productive.
This
 essay will discuss both sides of the argument in detail. From my perspective, lawbreakers should serve the best for the vicious crime they have committed, there should not be any violation of the law.
However
, isolating them from the nation can be beneficial for the country’s safety. They should receive adequate punishments and realize their faults for committing a crime before they are released into society ,
Otherwise
Add a comma
,Otherwise
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 those wrongdoers will commit more crimes as a habit. Some criminals even with rehabilitation centres and jail time turn towards misconduct.
Nevertheless
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,Nevertheless
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 criminals with professional talents or who have the potential for improvement should be granted an opportunity to work under imprisonment, so when they are released,they have plenty of skills and expertise
further
 they can start their life again in a better way. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
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example
Add a comma
,example
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 they can easily do handyman jobs like plumbing, construction , and electrician, and rather chose to study and became professionals like lawyers, doctors and many more, they can earn and make living after having the knowledge for it. In my conclusion, criminals should be trained under imprisonment for a better future and
also
 to not fall back into another crime and others should be disciplined
accordingly
. For closure, equal rights should be presented for the type of criminal.
Submitted by gnehraw on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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