IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The world should have only had one government rather than a national government for each country

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is
Correct pronoun usage
Is
show examples
 thought
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that the
world
Use synonyms
 should have a single
government
Use synonyms
 ,
inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
 of the fact that
religions
Correct article usage
the religions
show examples
 and nationalities of every country are different from
one
Use synonyms
 another.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
 there may be some advantages
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 controlling the
world
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 only
one
Use synonyms
authorty
Correct your spelling
authority
,
this
Linking Words
 essay
believe
Change the verb form
believes
show examples
 that the advantages of the proposal don’t
oughtweigh
Correct your spelling
outweigh
 the disadvantages. It can be problematic and unattainable. In fact ,if
Add an article
the
show examples
one
Use synonyms
-
world
Use synonyms
government
Use synonyms
 were accepted by other various
country
Change the wording
countries
show examples
, it would have some solutions in the form of global warming or global pollution as all of the
countries
Use synonyms
 in the
world
Use synonyms
 would discuss and prevent any kind of issues which can be harmful and dangerous for the Earth as immediately as they would.The result of
collobarating
Correct your spelling
collaborating
to carry out these problems which cause
world
Use synonyms
 destruction supports the Earth not damaging from demerits.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 essay pushes the idea ahead that the pros of
this
Linking Words
 proposition can’t afford to
weighting
Change the verb form
weight
show examples
 the cons of
such
Linking Words
case
Correct article usage
a case
show examples
. There may be
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tension among the
countries
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 the difference
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 religions or traditions.
It is clear that
Linking Words
one
Use synonyms
 religion
reject
Change the verb form
rejects
show examples
Correct article usage
the other’s
show examples
other’s
Correct quantifier usage
another’s
show examples
 rules and thoughts owing to being impossible to accept equally.
For instance
Linking Words
,
islam
Change the capitalization
Islam
show examples
 claims that bacon is forbidden
wheares
Correct your spelling
whereas
where
this
Linking Words
 is consumed substantially in
Christian
Replace the word
Christianity
show examples
. In conclusion, despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the fact that it could have a profound impact on leading by
one
Use synonyms
government
Use synonyms
 rather than
separate
Correct article usage
a separate
show examples
government
Use synonyms
. I’m convinced that there would be full of
opposions
Correct your spelling
oppositions
opposition
 even wars among the
countries
Use synonyms
 since it is impossible
acceptiong
Correct your spelling
accepting
 all
Use synonyms
countries
Change noun form
country's
countries'
show examples
 laws and rules equally as the same norm.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: