Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Few people believe that environmental contamination and housing are the predominant issues that all the authorities should concentrate on diminishing in order to preempt sickness and other health problems. I completely agree with the fact that these two things contribute to the majority of the health issues that exist today and can be avoided by improving on these two aspects. First and foremost, different types of pollution like air, water and soil which are resulting from industrialisation, technology, automobiles, and extreme usage of plastic and electronic products have been evolving day by day leading to a potential environmental catastrophe in future.
For instance
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, with every new vehicle on the road, the emission of gasses into the air increases causing an imbalance in the oxygen levels
due to
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pollution with other dangerous gases.
Consequently
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, whoever inhales it would suffer from lung and other organ diseases over a period of time.
In addition
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, industrial and human waste into seawater induces the death of water habitat which ultimately leads to ecological imbalance.
Similarly
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,
e-wastes
Correct your spelling
e-waste
that
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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disposed into soil plunges nutrients and reduces the yield
as well as
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the quality.
Secondly
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, many people across the world who are below the poverty line
couldn't
Wrong verb form
can't
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accommodate
Verb problem
afford
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rent or own a house for themselves,
therefore
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, end up living in slums with poor hygienic conditions.
As a consequence
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, they are easily prone to serious medical risks and
also
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infect other human beings who are less immune in one or the other way. Nowadays, infections proliferate swiftly without human contact and covid-19 is one
such
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example.
Hence
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, the government must step in and ensure that every individual resides in a hygienic location.
To conclude
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, it is the responsibility of every individual to contribute their part in order to reduce pollution and housing problems
however
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concerned authorities should enforce the regulations required to keep them under control.
As a result
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, there would be a reduction in health problems.
Submitted by prudhvi.pinninti18 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is well-structured with a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence. Use linking words and cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs more effectively.
task response
Address the prompt more directly, providing a more balanced view by considering potential counterarguments. Ensure that all ideas are relevant to the topic and develop them fully.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • preventive healthcare
  • environmental regulations
  • respiratory diseases
  • public health policies
  • sanitation facilities
  • urban planning
  • communicable diseases
  • socio-economic factors
  • sustainable development
  • government intervention
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • industrial emissions
  • air quality index
  • affordable housing
  • mental wellbeing
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