Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

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Smartphones

Use synonyms

have been popular since it was invented, especially among adolescent.

This

Linking Words

has led to a tremendous consequence that

children

Use synonyms

waste too much

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

using

smartphones

Use synonyms

. I strongly believe

this

Linking Words

is a negative development.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss my point of view with detailed analyses.

To begin

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with, the reason behind

this

Linking Words

trend is the overwhelming lifestyle of

children

Use synonyms

’s

parents

Use synonyms

. In

this

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century, everything has

becoming

Wrong verb form

become

show examples

criminally expensive

due to

Linking Words

many reasons, so both

parents

Use synonyms

in a family need to try their best to pay

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the bills.

As a result

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

often lack

time

Use synonyms

to spend on their

children

Use synonyms

and because of that,

kids

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have

their

Change the word

the

show examples

freedom to do whatever they want. Contents on

smartphones

Use synonyms

attract

children

Use synonyms

easily

due to

Linking Words

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

amusement and high level of

entertaining

Replace the word

entertainment

show examples

methods

such

Linking Words

as video games, films,

comic

Correct word choice

and comic

show examples

books,… so hardly any

kids

Use synonyms

can refuse

such

Linking Words

temptations. In the end, it is the busy lifestyle of the

parents

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that lead to

this

Linking Words

drawback. The consequences of

this

Linking Words

trend have caused public outrage for a long

time

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due to

Linking Words

its negativities.

Firstly

Linking Words

kids

Use synonyms

are being more violent than before. There are many social media on the internet that

children

Use synonyms

can access easily which can contain violent

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, youtube is a very popular platform which captures videos from all around the world with diverse categories and hardly any

kids

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do not know how to access

this

Linking Words

platform .

This

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directly

affect

Change the verb form

affects

show examples

Use synonyms

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

mental development when they get in touch with those toxic contents at

the

Correct article usage

show examples

early age.

Secondly

Linking Words

youngsters

Change noun form

youngsters'

youngster's

show examples

physical status nowadays are being worse than before. There is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

research define that obesity

rate

Fix the agreement mistake

rates

show examples

children

Use synonyms

are

Change the verb form

show examples

overwhelmingly rising.

This

Linking Words

is because

children

Use synonyms

nowadays have a sedentary

lifetyle

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

due to

Linking Words

Use synonyms

smartphones

Change the noun form

smartphone

show examples

addiction. In conclusion, I reiterate the overuse of

this

Linking Words

modern portable electronic device is a bad development, especially among youngsters. Adults must consider

to spend

Change the verb form

spending

show examples

time

Use synonyms

with their

children

Use synonyms

in order to educate and promote them

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a healthy lifestyle.

Submitted by smartdog2k on Mon Feb 06 2023

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are acomplete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Some believe that exercise is important for health while others think that balanced diet is more important. Discuss both points and give your opinion.