Topic: Health education is an essential aspect of community health. Do you agree or disagree?
The importance of providing better health information is still debatable since some communities believe medical literacy is a necessary factor in society's well-being.
This
essay will discuss why health literacy is becoming crucial in terms of mortality percentage and the nation's economy.
Nowadays, health training has become so
pivotal for citizens in the modern age. Rephrase
apply
Moreover
, giving people early information on how to maintain their fitness will reduce the mortality rate. As a result
, many older generations have realized that smoking can be harmful to the body. For instance
, since 2000, the percentage of cancer deaths has decreased by 40% due to
Indonesia's government trying to spread more awareness regarding the adverse impact of nicotine on the elderly on Java island
. Capitalize word
Island
Therefore
, it would be so
helpful if the government could invest more in strength discipline.
Rephrase
very
In addition
, improving strength awareness will increase the nation's income. Furthermore
, strong and healthy youngsters will be more productive and contribute more to the development of a country. Many youths from rural areas who have received fitness information since they were children are so
eager to pursue their dream Rephrase
apply
to increase
the wealth of their hometown. Change preposition
of increasing
For example
, in 2010, Eastern Economic Journal described that there was a strong connection between healthy graduates and the increment of company revenue in certain economic sectors such
as mining and telecommunications.
In conclusion, nowadays it is so
vital for the community to understand that strength literacy is necessary. The healthier the citizen, the less the fatality percentage in a nation. Aside from that, the stronger the people, the higher Rephrase
apply
revenue
will be produced in a country.Correct article usage
the revenue
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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task response
You have provided a clear response to the task, with relevant arguments and examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates coherent and cohesive development of ideas, with a clear logical structure, and a well-rounded introduction and conclusion.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?