IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries it is illegal for companies to reject job applicant for their age.is it positive or negetive devlopment?

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In
this
Linking Words
 perpetually transforming
era
Add a comma
,era
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 big multinational corporations usually hired energetic and young
employees
Use synonyms
 for other companies. A fraction of individuals
opine
Change the verb form
opines
show examples
 that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 it is unfair to hire only youngsters and reject
the
Correct article usage
apply
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aged people. I completely believe that it is
the
Correct article usage
a
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 negative development and
Use synonyms
company
Correct article usage
the company
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 should hire all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of
employees
Use synonyms
. In the forthcoming paragraph, I have elaborated
Linking Words
such
Change preposition
on such
show examples
view points
Correct your spelling
viewpoints
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 regarding
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon. the first and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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foremost reason is old people have full of
experience
Use synonyms
 and knowledge regarding business. Which helps the
company
Use synonyms
 in the future. To elaborate these,
employees
Use synonyms
 have worked for other companies before and
that is
Linking Words
 why they have
experience
Use synonyms
 about which kind of leaps and bounds comes in the
buisness
Correct your spelling
business
.
Also
Linking Words
, they can help other
employees
Use synonyms
 in their
work
Use synonyms
 because they have enough knowledge about
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 from their previous jobs. And, if any kind of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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detrimental situation happens in the
company
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
 only
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
an experience
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experience
Wrong verb form
experienced
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 person can save the corporation in the future, which is very crucial for any multinational conglomerate. Another reason is that
experience
Use synonyms
 people
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 more efficiently than young stars
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because
younger
Add an article
the younger
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 generation
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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usually
waste
Correct subject-verb agreement
wastes
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 time on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other things and they are not enough
focused
Change the form of the verb
focus
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.
in addition
Linking Words
 and
Use synonyms
experience
Correct your spelling
experienced
show examples
Use synonyms
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
 know how to build a team how to take
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 from the
employee
Use synonyms
 how to encourage them how to face
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
challenges.These skills are more
crusial
Correct your spelling
crucial
 for any big
corporations
Fix the agreement mistake
corporation
show examples
.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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 an experienced
Use synonyms
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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 know to team up with freshers because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they are very cooperative in nature.
To conclude
Linking Words
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
, an experienced
employee
Use synonyms
 can benefit the
company
Use synonyms
 in many ways.
For example
Linking Words
, aged
Use synonyms
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
 have lots of
experience
Use synonyms
 and knowledge about business.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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 they know how to take
work
Use synonyms
 from
employee
Use synonyms
 and
work
Use synonyms
 with
co operation
Correct your spelling
cooperation
show examples
.
That is
Linking Words
 why companies should not hire
Use synonyms
Add an article
an employee
the employee
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employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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 on
tha
Correct your spelling
the
 basis
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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