IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of enquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of enquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
 line chart depicts the figures of questions which were asked by tourists in one city through the period from January to June in 2001.It
clear
Add a missing verb
is clear
show examples
 from the graph that a higher number of questions were asked in person.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown,the
Correct quantifier usage
number of enquirer's
show examples
enquirer's
Change noun form
enquirers
show examples
 by telephone
were fluctuated
Change to the active voice
fluctuated
show examples
 during the period from January till March.
Then
Linking Words
 it remained
steadily
Change the word
steady
show examples
 from March until April.After
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
 it increased gradually in April
as well as
Linking Words
 the following two months.
In addition
Linking Words
,there was a moderate decline in the questions by emails throughout the period from January
till
Change preposition
to
show examples
may
Capitalize the word
May
show examples
.
Then
Linking Words
 it maintained the same level which was just below 400.The
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
in person
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
enquirer's
Change the noun form
enquirers
enquirer
show examples
grow
Wrong verb form
grown
show examples
 rapidly and it reached it is peak nearly just over 1800 in June .
To sum up
Linking Words
,we could say that the numbers of
in person
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
enquirer's
Change noun form
enquirers
show examples
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 the highest through six months in 2001.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • number of inquiries
  • Tourist Information Office
  • six-month period
  • increased steadily
  • reached a peak
  • decreased slightly
  • increased dramatically
  • experienced a gradual decline
  • general trend
  • highest number
  • lowest number
  • significant increase
  • tourism interest
What to do next:
Look at other essays: