IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some People Believe That Children Should Study Academic Subjects At School; Others Believe That Practical Subjects Are More Important

#people #children #study #subjects #school
Nowadays, whether
schools
 should pay more attention to teaching academic
subjects
 or not has become a very controversial issue,
while
 some argue that
schools
 should put some practical
subjects
 in the syllabus now. I agree that teaching non-academic lessons is a good long-term development. There are two main reasons why practical
subjects
 are essential.
Firstly
,
children
's abilities are more critical than scores. If
schools
 prioritize improving
children
's comprehensive abilities rather than scores, it will enable
students
 to develop in an all-around way. The end to
this
 is that
children
 may be able to achieve more competitiveness in the future.
Furthermore
, there are many who argue that non-academic lessons are necessary for
students
 to obtain practical skills. The reason for
this
 is that if
schools
 set up some
subjects
such
 as cooking, which not only enable
children
 to gain a skill but
also
 appreciate their parents for taking care of them.
As a result
 of teaching practical skills to
students
 is an excellent way to their future.
On the other hand
, there are
also
 many counterarguments to teaching non-academic curriculums. First of all, some people argue that
students
 should focus on learning academic
subjects
. If
students
 pay more attention to learning math, it may allow them to find a decent job and improve their quality of life.
This
 means that they will have a good career
prospect
Fix the agreement mistake
prospects
show examples
 and give their families adequate security.
Moreover
, some professors argue that
students
 need to dedicate more time to science. From
this
 viewpoint, learning academic
subjects
 are more crucial than practical lessons.
According to
 the facts outlined above, one understands, and I believe that practical
subjects
 not only allow
children
 to develop in an all-around way but
also
 achieve well-being life in the future.
Submitted by feilove2002 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • well-rounded education
  • discover their interests and strengths
  • basic understanding
  • interconnected world
  • higher motivation
  • deeper knowledge
  • mental health
  • reducing unnecessary stress
  • boredom
  • balanced approach
  • successful specialization
  • well-informed perspective
  • solid general education
  • freedom to delve deeper
  • specialized future career path
What to do next:
Look at other essays: