IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Fossil fuels are essential for producing electricity, powering industry and fueling transportation. However, one day we will reach a point when all the world's fossil fuels have been depleted. How can we conserve these resources? What are some alternatives to fossil fuels?

#fuels #electricity #industry #transportation #point #world #resources #alternatives
Someday,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
non-renewable
energy
such
 as fossil
fuels
 which
producing
Wrong verb form
produce
show examples
 electricity,
powering
Replace the word
power
show examples
 industry and
fueling
Replace the word
fuel
show examples
 transportation will reach an end of
usageable
Correct your spelling
useable
usage able
periode
Correct your spelling
period
 when all the world's fossil
fuels
depleted
Add a missing verb
are depleted
show examples
. The essay
bellow
Correct your spelling
below
show examples
 will discuss the background
why
Change preposition
of why
show examples
 fossil
fuels
are become
Change to the active voice
become
have become
show examples
 the most
consumpted
Correct your spelling
consumed
consumption
 resource
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and some examples of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alternatives resource.
The fossil
Correct article usage
Fossil
show examples
fuels
 consumption are majorly used for
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
,
such
 as
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
,
motorcycle
Fix the agreement mistake
motorcycles
show examples
 and
airplane
Fix the agreement mistake
airplanes
show examples
. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 various
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 why
fuels
 are very
dominate
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
 in the global
energy's
Change noun form
energy
show examples
 market. It is because they are cheap,
easy
Correct word choice
and easy
show examples
, and the supporting infrastructure
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 established for a very long period.
Thus
, made
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fossil
fuels
 become the most
recognited
Correct your spelling
recognised
recognized
energy
 option for most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 in the world.
Hence
, it is the government's duty who should create
an initiatives
Correct the article-noun agreement
initiatives
an initiative
show examples
 to find solutions to reduce the usability of fossil
fuels
, like
create
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
show examples
 or
introduce
Wrong verb form
introducing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alternative
energy
. There are several alternative
energy
,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
renewable
energy
, that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 could use to replace the usage of fossil
fuels
.
For instance
, hydrocarbon, wind and nuclear
energy
. In some of
advance
Add an article
the advance
show examples
country
Change the noun form
countries
show examples
 like
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States of America, and Japan,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were already settled to
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of
energy
 from
few
Change the article
a few
show examples
 decades ago.
However
, some developing
countryare
Correct your spelling
country are
country
 still depend on fossil
energy
 because not every country has
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
priviledge
Correct your spelling
privilege
privileged
 or access
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 knowledge to create the infrastructure for renewable
energy
. In conclusion, finding new
alternatives
Change the noun form
alternative
show examples
energy
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 become an urgent matter every country around the world should do before fossil
fuels
 are completely depleted.
Submitted by raymondgandi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: