Today people live longer after retiring from work. What problems does this cause for individuals and society? What can be done?

#people #work #individuals #society

It's undeniable that the lifespan of pensioners, has drastically increased,

However

Add a comma

,However

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this

increase has led to overdependence on the younger generation resulting

resulting

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

in immense financial and emotional burden. Having a

retirement

plan could greatly help reduce these pressures.

Firstly

, traditionally it has been the responsibility of the youth to take care of the old and more so

this

is seen

whe

Correct your spelling

when

they retire.

However

this

dependence on the younger generation has led

majority

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the majority

a majority

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of them to feel burdened financially and emotionally.

This

is because most retirees especially those who worked in

low income

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low-income

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jobs never prepared or kept any savings for later use during

retirement

. And,

thus

causing the responsibility of taking care of them to fall squarely on the shoulders of the young. Enrolling in a pensioner scheme before

retirement

could greatly reduce

this

burden because the retiree could be making small contributions towards the scheme

Add the comma(s)

, therefore,

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therefore

providing

financial

Correct article usage

a financial

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cushion upon

retirement

. Currently, in

Kenya

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,Kenya

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there is a National social security fund whose

objectives

Fix the agreement mistake

objective

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is to provide financial security to those in

retirement

To conclude

, as life expectancy

continue

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continues

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to be on the rise, it is essential to reduce the burdens placed upon the younger generation through proper planning of pensioners by enrolling into

pensioners

Change noun form

pensioners'

pensioner's

show examples

schemes for financial security.

Submitted by wanjalahope14 on Sun Feb 12 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

211 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today people live longer after retiring from work. What problems does this cause for individuals and society? What can be done?

Fully explain your ideas

Some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in.

Some people say that success is "10 percent talent and 90 percent hard work". Is hard work the key to success, or is talent also important

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

You want to join a local club or organization. Write a letter to the club secretary. In your letter: - Introduce yourself and explain why you are interested. - Ask about membership requirements. - Enquire about the next meeting or event.

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.