IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The best way to learn about other cultures is to work in multinational organisations. Do you agree or disagree?

#cultures #work #organisations
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is believed
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that multinational companies have given
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employees
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
exposure to different
cultures
Use synonyms
. I believe that
although
Linking Words
 working in a multinational organisation is a good
way
Use synonyms
 to understand and learn about another country's
culture
Use synonyms
, it cannot be deemed as the best method. There is no doubt that working in a large
MNC
Use synonyms
 presents some opportunities to learn about other
cultures
Use synonyms
 as employees deal with colleagues, businesses and clients from different parts of the globe.
For example
Linking Words
, in some
Use synonyms
cultures
Add a comma
,cultures
show examples
 it is normal to address clients and basses by their first name
whereas
Linking Words
 in others it is considered disrespectful.
Similarly
Linking Words
, countries like Japan and Germany are sticklers for punctuality and
people
Use synonyms
 are expected to arrive on time for meetings but in other
cultures
Use synonyms
 being a few minutes late is acceptable. Having said that, working in an
MNC
Use synonyms
 is definitely not the best
way
Use synonyms
 to learn about a
culture
Use synonyms
 and there are better ways than it. One
way
Use synonyms
 to experience and understand other
cultures
Use synonyms
 is to actually travel to those countries and live their lifestyle. Travelling lets one experience all aspects of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
culture
Use synonyms
 like food, language, customs, festivals etc.
However
Linking Words
, in an
MNC
Use synonyms
, employees are restricted to just corporate aspects of a
culture
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, travelling lets you meet
people
Use synonyms
 from different work backgrounds and not just the corporate world. There are other ways that are more fun and effective in learning about other
cultures
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, watching a foreign language movie, trying a new ethnic food recipe from another country and learning a foreign dance form online. These methods are
stress free
Add a hyphen
stress-free
show examples
 and entertaining,
whereas
Linking Words
 corporate
culture
Use synonyms
 is so stressful that
people
Use synonyms
 do not get time to learn about other
people
Use synonyms
's
cultures
Use synonyms
. To reiterate, working in
a
Change the article
an
show examples
MNC
Use synonyms
 is definitely a good
way
Use synonyms
 to know about another
culture
Use synonyms
, but it is certainly not the best.
Submitted by manekiyaadil on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: