this graph below shows the number of library books read by boys and girls ar Starmoth School from 2006 to the present.

this graph below shows the number of library books read by boys and girls ar Starmoth School from 2006 to the present.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
chart appearance about graduates of different sex who study books in their library. from 2006 to the present. In
this
Linking Words
,
Add an article
an
the
show examples
essay I will analyze
this
Linking Words
graph carefully and
also
Linking Words
give an appropriate analogy. As can be observed
this
Linking Words
is a fluctuating graph.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
chart began in 2009. as can estimate the number of
girls
Use synonyms
who read books was only 22
people
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
the
boys
Use synonyms
were more active. 44
people
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
boys
Use synonyms
had reddened the book from the library. In 2010 both groups had a slight increase in the past. The number of
boys
Use synonyms
got to 80
people
Use synonyms
. And
also
Linking Words
the
girls
Use synonyms
had 40
people
Use synonyms
in the chart.
This
Linking Words
trend continued until 2011. in that year
this
Linking Words
school had spectacular changes in
girls
Use synonyms
. because both of them were the same. And were 100
people
Use synonyms
. The girl's group had a sharp rise in that year. In 2012 the number of
boys
Use synonyms
had a gradual decrease. They went to 80
people
Use synonyms
on the graph. But
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
girls
Use synonyms
went up to 140
people
Use synonyms
in that year.
Girls
Use synonyms
had a dramatic rise between 2011 and 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
, both groups had ascending trend until 2011. but in
last
Linking Words
, the
girls
Use synonyms
' group overcome the
boys
Use synonyms
finally
Linking Words
.
Submitted by mohammad.rahmanifx22 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Vocabulary: Replace the words girls, people, boys with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: