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Writing Samples
Band 7

People nowadays are spending more time at the work place and it is argued this is a problem for family life.To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #time #work #place #life
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The contemporary world demands
people
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 to work every day as capitalism is streamlined.
Besides
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 financial stability requires a lot of sacrifices ,including spending
time
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 with family. In my point of view,
This
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 trend deleteriously affects family
life
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 in qualitative and quantitative manners. On one hand,
people
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 have a limited
life
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 span, during
this
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 period they have to enjoy
life
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 to the full extent.
Although
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people
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 engage in occupations to earn money,it has become a burden to enjoy
life
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 to the fullest.The mind of the human is created in a way to interact with others in an emotional way.The mind should be nurtured with affection,sympathy and empathy
otherwise
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,
people
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 will no longer be humans.Family is the utmost space which facilitates that soothing effect on brains.when there is no
time
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 to spend with parents and children for caring and spouse for sharing those powerful emotions are buried forever , creating robots or monsters.
Hence
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 ,
this
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 will definitely violate the norm of family
life
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.
On the other hand
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,built-in stress during employment tends to harbour depression among
people
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 as overworking invariably put a strain on the mind.Even though
people
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 have the opportunity to be with their loved ones,
this
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 mental instability will become an issue in dealing with family members , leaving a poor-quality relationship.
For instance
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,individuals with a lack of interest in
life
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due to
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 depression will not see any importance in the existence of their family and dependents have to bear the consequences.
Furthermore
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, children who are in dire need of protection will be neglected and prone to experience abuse. In conclusion, I believe spending more
time
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 on work affects families in a negative way as it reduces
time
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, spent with loved ones,which is extremely essential to be nurtured as humans and the quality of family
life
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 as stressful
people
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 will not be able to enjoy
life
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 as it is.
Submitted by g.s.subasinghe on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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