It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#it #schoolchildren #history #world

History is extremely crucial for toddlers. It is argued that native history is good for students as compared to world chronicle. I partially agree with the given statement. To commence with, youngsters should learn about

past

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

time because it

is providing

Wrong verb form

provides

show examples

essential information

between

Change preposition

about

show examples

traditions and cultures.

In other words

, several nations have made memorials a compulsory subject for senior secondary schools. Many ancient people sacrificed their lives to preserve cultures. It

is providing

Wrong verb form

provides

show examples

information regarding traditional events and customs. Local natives should need proper comprehension.

For example

, more than one-fifth of the population lost their lives in 1923 fighting against the American troops and protecting China. After that, the Chinese authorities

make

Wrong verb form

made

show examples

history subjects compulsory for secondary and college students.

Thus

, memoirs are extremely important for adolescents.

In addition

, general knowledge about all cultures is extremely beneficial for inhabitants. They can effortlessly make a successful career as a teacher or professor because teachers should understand all kinds of civilizations.

For example

, Mark Johnson had widespread popularity

due to

massive comprehension. Students

were liking

Wrong verb form

liked

show examples

to talk with him. They had a great professor in the world.

As a result

, all kinds of knowledge are vital for juveniles.

To conclude

, unquestionably, all kinds of understanding are important and teenagers should read seriously because it is providing prehistoric times. Several individuals had lost their lives.

Submitted by lovishh on Thu Feb 16 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Improve task response by addressing the prompt directly and providing a clear stance on the topic.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, and the main points are not well-supported. Work on structuring the essay with clear paragraphs and linking words for better coherence and cohesion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

223 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think that we should divide students based on their academic ability, while others think we should educate all students together. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While it is widely debated that division of classroom based on student's academic performance should be implemented in school as it provides an appropriate focus for each group, others argue that it is better to educate mixed-level of students together as to promote discrimination-free among the students. Both point of view and reasons why I support with the latter statement will be elaborated on in this essay.
5
band
People who decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it are more likely to have a satisfying working life than those who change jobs frequently.To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
At the beginning i would to express how suitable work is important, and suitable work means a work which portrays your abilities and enhanced them , and shifting your career earlier is the best way to determine your goals and for sure it is better than remaining in the same work your hall life without ambitious goals, but even i consider path career is the best solution to achieve a great dream, I will discuss both sides the advantages and disadvantages.
7.5
band
In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?
In today's society era, foreigner's meal is more high-rated than local cooking. According to the writer’s opinion, this is because imported food has better standards, and guarantees the cooking’s quality and safety. Additionally, buying local meals will support the government and improve the quality of the community’s bread.
5.5
band
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them
Nowadays, with development of parenting method, some people argue that it is imperative for children to decide everyday matters by their own while others argue it will bring a negative impact to society as they will become selfish individuals. The following essay will discuss both points of view and present my perspective.
6.5
band
These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
The advantages of mobile phones and the Internet outweigh the disadvantages when it comes to social relationships. While it's true that these technologies can sometimes impede face-to-face communication, the benefits they bring to our social lives are indisputable.

It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that we should divide students based on their academic ability, while others think we should educate all students together. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People who decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it are more likely to have a satisfying working life than those who change jobs frequently.To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?