IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people believe that studying abroad is important because it expands a person’s knowledge and understanding of the world. Others feel that it is better to study at home because that is the best way to prepare for a career in the student’s own country. Discuss both views, and give your opinion

#people #person’s #world #study #home #career #student’s #country
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the present age, whether studying abroad provides more benefits than studying at home has sparked much debate. Some people assert that
students
Use synonyms
 in their own country have better academic achievements,
whereas
Linking Words
 many others argue that pupils outside of their
countries
Use synonyms
 have better social skills and development. Personally, I am in favour of the latter view. Convincing arguments can be made that studying overseas has major advantages for
students
Use synonyms
. To start with, they learn new skills and novel methods, which are very necessary to find an appropriate job.
In other words
Linking Words
, trainees can instruct methods which no one teaches them in their country;
therefore
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 can learn these skills and teach them in their hometown and eventually earn a lot of money.
Moreover
Linking Words
, apprentices can familiar with new cultures and interact with strangers easily.
Lastly
Linking Words
, scholars in developing
countries
Use synonyms
 cannot find their dream jobs in their own
countries
Use synonyms
;
therefore
Linking Words
, they can't use their knowledge and their gifts, but by studying abroad they can find an appropriate job in line with their qualifications. Admittedly, recruitments can serve their own
countries
Use synonyms
, by studying and working for their own people.
This
Linking Words
 is because some people are genius and they can solve many environmental and economic problems and
also
Linking Words
 discover new ideas;
therefore
Linking Words
 by sending them abroad we lose these extraordinary talents. Even so, these intelligent nations sometimes don't have opportunities to progress and bloom their capabilities.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the benefits of schooling at home are quite limited. In summary, I would concede that studying at home has some merits. Despite that, education overseas supports
students
Use synonyms
 in a much better way.
Overall
Linking Words
, I am convinced that apprentices should be studying abroad.
Submitted by Babak.ghassemi.9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • expand one's horizons
  • cultural immersion
  • language proficiency
  • global perspective
  • educational diversity
  • professional networking
  • local job market
  • career prospects
  • financial burden
  • industry practices
What to do next:
Look at other essays: