some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money and the money could be better spend on other things. Discuss both views and your own opinion.

Some individuals believe that the Olympic
Games
serve as thrilling gatherings that unite nations,
while
others argue that they represent a misallocation of funds, which could be more effectively utilized
elsewhere
.
This
essay aims to explore both perspectives and offer the
writer
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writer's
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opinion, it
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
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expensive
Correct word choice
apply
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outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
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the
benefits
of it bring for everyone. The Olympic
Games
are undeniably one of the most anticipated global events, captivating audiences worldwide with thrilling displays of athleticism, sportsmanship, and cultural exchange. For many, the
Olympics
symbolize a beacon of unity, where athletes from diverse backgrounds converge to compete on a level playing field, transcending political and cultural barriers. The camaraderie forged among nations during the
Games
fosters a sense of interconnectedness and mutual respect, promoting peace and understanding on an international scale.
Moreover
, the excitement generated by the
Olympics
inspires millions to embrace sports and healthy lifestyles, serving as a catalyst for positive societal change.
However
, amidst the spectacle and pageantry of the
Olympics
lies a sobering reality: the staggering financial costs associated with hosting the
Games
. Critics argue that the exorbitant expenditures required to construct state-of-the-art venues, upgrade infrastructure, and enhance security far outweigh the economic
benefits
derived from hosting the event. Many host cities and countries find themselves burdened with crippling debt long after the
Games
have concluded, with promised economic windfalls failing to materialize.
Moreover
, the allocation of vast sums of money to the
Olympics
often comes at the expense of pressing social needs,
such
as education, healthcare, and poverty alleviation, exacerbating inequalities and widening the gap between the haves and have-nots.
While
I acknowledge the excitement and unifying spirit embodied by the Olympic
Games
, I am inclined to agree with the sentiment that the exorbitant costs associated with hosting the event often outweigh its
benefits
. It is imperative that host cities and countries exercise prudence and foresight in their decision-making processes, carefully weighing the potential economic and social impacts of hosting the
Olympics
. Efforts should be made to prioritize responsible budgeting and planning, ensuring that investments in the
Games
yield tangible, long-term
benefits
for local communities.
Additionally
, greater transparency and accountability in the bidding and hosting process are essential to mitigate the risk of financial mismanagement and ensure that the
Olympics
fulfill
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fulfil
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their promise of fostering unity and inspiration. Ultimately,
while
the
Olympics
may continue to captivate the world with their spectacle and excitement, their true value lies in their ability to leave a lasting legacy of positive change and progress.
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task achievement
You have provided a clear and balanced discussion of both sides of the argument. However, your thesis statement could be more direct and clear. Try to explicitly state your opinion in the introduction to add clarity.
coherence cohesion
To further enhance the logical structure, you can consider using more varied transitions between ideas and arguments. This can help in making the flow of your essay even smoother.
task achievement
Including more specific examples, such as mentioning recent Olympic host cities and their post-Games economic conditions, would strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, providing a clear context and summarizing your arguments effectively.
task achievement
You have successfully addressed both views of the argument and presented your own opinion with sufficient reasoning.
supporting main points
The points are well-supported with logical arguments and are effectively linked to the overarching theme of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Promotes global unity
  • Cultural exchange
  • Economic benefits
  • Job creation
  • Tourism
  • Infrastructure
  • Active lifestyle
  • Financial undertaking
  • Economic burden
  • Underutilization
  • Wasted resources
  • White elephants
  • Opportunity cost
  • Critical areas
  • Social welfare
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