The diagram illustrates how bees produce honey. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The flow chart shows how to manufacture
honey
by
Change preposition
apply
bees
. There are seven steps to make honey
. It begins with building hives, collecting nectar
from flowers, drying out the nectar
, and eventually, honey
is produced by bees
.
Firstly
, the bees
gather to build hives, a container of honey
. It is usually built individually but connect to each other. Next,
they would leave the nest and search for flowers since they need to collect nectar
. And the next step, bees
bring the sweet liquid from the fauna and place it into the hives.
After the process of storage, the production progress begins. Bees
use their wings to make evaporation to dry out the honey
. Water can be exchanged by air. The nectar
is cool down since honey
needs to be formed. Finally
, the honey
is produced and ready to put it
into jars. Correct pronoun usage
apply
That is
what the consumer is familiar with the look of honey
.Submitted by blair.chang975640 on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words honey, bees, nectar with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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