Some people think that the Olympics is no longer important in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #olympics #st #century

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Some people

are in

Verb problem

apply

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believe that the Olympic game lost their popularity and importance in

this

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era. I will consider

this

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subject and I will elaborate on my opinion too. The first international game goes back to the ancient

greeks

Capitalize word

Greeks

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so they

hold

Wrong verb form

held

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this

Linking Words

competition as an appreciation for their cultivates, which had grown in one year. Ultimately,

this

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ceremony

leads

Wrong verb form

led

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to the gathering of all nations and tribes who

have

Wrong verb form

had

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been controlled by the central authority, and it helped them to get

along with

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each other.

subsequently

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this

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custom has been continued by governments who had been connected with

greeks

Capitalize word

Greeks

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and by passing of the time it

convert

Wrong verb form

converted

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to cosmopolitan competition. So, friendship and

civilizations

Fix the agreement mistake

civilization

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conversation

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

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and are the most important

feature

Fix the agreement mistake

features

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this

Linking Words

ceremony; meanwhile, the symbol of

this

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competition is the five connective circles with different colours which is a metaphor for different human species. Regarding

Correct article usage

the

show examples

industrial revolution, communication instruments have grown, and

consequently

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, some people express that they no

Rephrase

longer

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need to disburse a great deal of money for collecting nations and it is completely in vain in

this

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era.

On the other hand

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, critics say;

having

Correct word choice

that having

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utilised early components and fossil fuels, mankind put the planet in danger so

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coherence and cohesion

In developing your main points, ensure that each paragraph aligns closely with your overall argument. For example, the history of the Olympics and their role in fostering unity is relevant but seems somewhat disjointed from your argument about their importance today.

task response

Expand on your ideas to provide a comprehensive response. Consider both sides of the argument: explore how the Olympics may no longer be as important for some and what alternatives societies might pursue.

task response

Include specific examples to support your points, such as mentioning recent Olympic events or how the Olympics contribute to global peace.

coherence and cohesion

Revisit your introduction and conclusion to ensure they effectively frame and summarize your arguments, leading to a cohesive essay.

task response

The essay effectively begins with a clear position on the topic and outlines the intention to explain it, which provides a good start.

coherence and cohesion

You provide a historical context that adds depth to the discussion, showcasing your ability to incorporate background information.

task response

The essay recognizes both historical and modern perspectives, indicating an awareness of contrasting opinions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

205 words

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Some people think that the Olympics is no longer important in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Should private schools receive government funding? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 254 words.

With increasing populations and ever growing urban centres, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protect places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

Some people think that teenage years are the happiest times of most people's life. Others think that adult life brings more happiness in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Around the world children learn English language as a second language at school. however, in some places they also learn at Kinder garden. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of learning at kinder garden?

Some people think that everyone has the right to have access to university education, and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?