IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Traffic jams are a problem for individuals to use roads freely in major cities. What problems does it have for individuals? How individuals can reduce traffic?

#traffic #jams #individuals #roads #cities
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is observed that
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 issue for
people
Use synonyms
 to
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
roads
Use synonyms
 in many cities. From my point of view, there are reasons contributing to
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon.
However
Linking Words
, there are
solutions
Use synonyms
 to
this
Linking Words
 incident which I will discuss in
this
Linking Words
 essay.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are two main problems
relate
Wrong verb form
related
show examples
 to
this
Linking Words
 topic. The first bad thing about
traffic
Use synonyms
 jam is that it increases the level of
strees
Correct your spelling
stress
.
In other words
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who drive their cars might be very angry and depressed
into
Change preposition
by
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
heavy
traffic
Use synonyms
.
The
Remove the article
Another
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 problem is that it causes
loosing
Replace the word
losing
show examples
 lots of money.
This
Linking Words
 is because, If a city has a great deal of
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion, there will become many
traffic
Use synonyms
 accidents, so
people
Use synonyms
loose
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 their money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 repairs.
For example
Linking Words
, Istanbul is a
cosmopolit
Correct your spelling
cosmopolitan
cosmopolite
 city, in
particularly
Replace the word
particular
show examples
, almost every
Use synonyms
roads
Change to a singular noun
road
show examples
full
Add a missing verb
is full
show examples
 of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 during the
cummuting
Correct your spelling
commuting
computing
 time.
As a result
Linking Words
 of
this
Linking Words
 situation, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 in living big cities, can not drive easily and live
healthy
Change the adjective
healthily
show examples
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, there are two
possibe
Correct your spelling
possible
solutions
Use synonyms
 which we could mention. The first solution
about
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 governments should expand ways to drive safely.
In other words
Linking Words
, If the
roads
Use synonyms
 could be expanded,
people
Use synonyms
 will use their cars easily. In
adddition
Correct your spelling
addition
 to
this
Linking Words
, local administrators ought to limit
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
long and heavy
vehicles
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as lorries and tanks. Because these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 lead to
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams.
For example
Linking Words
, In Canada, a great
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
 of
roads
Use synonyms
 were expanded for private cars and obligated for heavy
vehicles
Use synonyms
, so
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 is so satisfied.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I strongly believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it is reasonable
Use synonyms
solutions
Fix the agreement mistake
solution
show examples
 and should have applied. In conclusion, even though heavy
traffic
Use synonyms
 causes some problems for drivers
such
Linking Words
 as increasing the level of stress and
loosing
Replace the word
losing
show examples
 money,
In addition
Linking Words
 to these issues, the
suggessted
Correct your spelling
suggested
 possible
solutions
Use synonyms
 which are expanding ways and limiting
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
use could be useful. If we do not apply these remedies, it will be harmful consequences for society.
Submitted by orhanveli2006 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: