IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a weekly payment from the government. Some people think that this payment should be stopped and that people should be made to work for their money. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #people #payment #government #work #money
Unemployment
benefits
 have been a contentious issue in many countries, with some advocating for their discontinuation and others opposing
this
 view. In my opinion, the provision of financial
support
 to the unemployed is necessary to ensure their basic needs are met
while
 they search for
employment
. On the one hand, proponents of discontinuing
unemployment
benefits
 argue that it is unfair for taxpayers to fund
individuals
 who are not actively seeking
employment
. They believe that the threat of losing financial
support
 will motivate
individuals
 to actively seek
employment
, leading to a reduction in the number of unemployed people.
Moreover
, they argue that providing financial assistance to the unemployed may create a culture of dependency, discouraging
individuals
 from seeking work.
On the other hand
, those who
support
unemployment
benefits
 argue that they are necessary to ensure that the unemployed can meet their basic needs
while
 they search for
employment
. Without
this
support
, they may be forced to turn to other means of
support
,
such
 as crime, which may have negative social and economic consequences.
Furthermore
,
unemployment
benefits
 provide a safety net for those who are temporarily out of work
due to
 unforeseen circumstances,
such
 as illness or injury. In my view, the provision of
unemployment
benefits
 is necessary to
support
individuals
 who are temporarily out of work.
While
 it is true that some people may take advantage of the system, the majority of unemployed
individuals
 are actively seeking
employment
 but are unable to find it
due to
 a variety of reasons,
such
 as a lack of jobs in their field or a lack of necessary skills. Cutting off financial
support
 to these
individuals
 would have negative consequences for both the
individuals
 and society as a whole. In conclusion, I disagree with the view that
unemployment
benefits
 should be discontinued.
While
 it is important to ensure that the system is not abused, providing financial
support
 to the unemployed is necessary to
support
individuals
 in their time of need and to prevent negative social and economic consequences.
Submitted by kamranasatirsyady on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: