IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #methods
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parents
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 prefer
home
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 learning for their
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children
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’s
education
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 nowadays
while
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 others believe
school
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 learning is essential for
Use synonyms
children
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’s development. I agreed that both of them are
beneficials
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 for
children
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, and
parents
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 can choose the best options for their
children
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 after a proper assessment of their
Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
’s preferences and needs. On the one hand,
home
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education
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 can provide individual
education
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 to
children
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 compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
group learning at
school
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.
Firstly
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, generally,
parents
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 are
a
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apply
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vital person who
most
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apply
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knows their
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children
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’s
characters
Fix the agreement mistake
character
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 and learning needs.
Also
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, they are great influencers on their
children
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 because they usually are the first role models when
children
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 learn how to behave during socialization.
Thus
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,
parents
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 will be ideal people to provide or design courses by their
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children
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’s personalities and learning needs and
then
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 give
children
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 a proper
education
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.
Moreover
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, Choosing
home
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education
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 can reduce the time and money on commuting and tuition.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
 the other hand, some people think
school
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education
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 can not be replaced by
home
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education
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due to
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 crucial advantages. First of all,
school
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education
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 can provide a systemic and organized curriculum for
Use synonyms
children
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’s learning needs. Most of the courses are designed following
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
general
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children
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’s development.
Moreover
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,
while
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 learning in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
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,
children
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 can utilize various facilities and
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
 from trained teachers.
Furthermore
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,
children
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 can learn about teamwork and how to cooperate with others
while
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 learning in a group at
school
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.
Thus
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, I believe that both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
educations
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
 are
Add an article
an advantage
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advantage
Replace the word
advantageous
show examples
 for
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children
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’s development,
while
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 which
education
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 is better for
children
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 depends on proper assessments of
Use synonyms
children
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’s needs and the resources which can provide by(from) the
Use synonyms
children
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’s families.
Thus
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,
parents
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 can make the best decision for their
children
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 to study at
home
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 or
school
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.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • personalized learning
  • cater
  • flexible schedule
  • extracurricular activities
  • safe learning environment
  • bullying
  • peer pressure
  • socialization
  • diversity awareness
  • structured environment
  • discipline
  • punctuality
  • resources and facilities
  • communication skills
  • teamwork
  • specialized subjects
  • experts
What to do next:
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