IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

These days people in some countries are living in a “throwaway” society which means people use things in a short time then throw them away. What are its causes and what impacts can it have? 

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Modern day
Add a hyphen
Modern-day

It seems that Modern day is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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 society is mired in a notion, known as "throwaway" customer culture.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 culture is based upon the idea that
things
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 we are buying are
temporarily
Change the word
temporary

Temporarily seems to be the wrong part of speech for this context.

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 and we don't even need them to be usable for a long time. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
way
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of social consciousness people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb are appears to be unnecessary here.

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tend to see
disposadle
Correct your spelling
disposable

If you don’t want disposadle to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

things
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 to be more practical than reusable.
Such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 a
way
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of thinking causes people to choose short-term pleasures
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 of long-term ones. And buying
things
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is obviously a good
way
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 to cheer yourself up.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 - buying prepared food in
supermarket
Correct article usage
a supermarket

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 saves
your
Correct pronoun usage
you

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 time and gives you an opportunity to choose any meal you want every time. It
sound
Change the verb form
sounds

It appears that the subject pronoun It and the verb sound are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

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 more comfortable than cooking for yourself and being limited with the products you have in your
frige
Correct your spelling
fridge

If you don’t want frige to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, but it's barely cheaper or healthier.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it
produses
Correct your spelling
produces

If you don’t want produses to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

much more trash. Speaking about trash, throwaway society seems to be the main reason for the level of waste to
increas
Correct your spelling
increase

If you don’t want increas to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

more and more every year.
As
Change preposition
For

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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instance - one-off electronic cigarettes. I, personally, see
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this people
Change the determiner
this person
these people

It appears that the singular demonstrative this is modifying the plural noun people. Consider using a plural demonstrative or a singular noun instead.

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 with
dispoasdle
Correct your spelling
disposable

If you don’t want dispoasdle to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

vapes all over, and it's scary to even imagine how much
plastics
Fix the agreement mistake
plastic

It seems that plastics may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 and electronics
is
Change the verb form
are

The verb is does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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 thrown away
everyday
Replace the word
every day

The word everyday may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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. It is worth mentioning, that plastics and electronics (especially batteries) are very pollutive
things
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 to be just thrown in a trash bin, they need to be recycled in a special
way
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. To
concude
Correct your spelling
conclude

If you don’t want concude to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, a "throwaway" customer culture, caused by a sharp rise in
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 standard of living, is very offensive
for
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 ecology. It's
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 no good for society as we value
things
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 less, because of living with the thought that you can always buy a new one.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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