To conclude, many people are not getting the right amount of rest their body needs because they need to make a living and want to start their day early. As a result, not only their health is affected but also their relationships.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The modern world states that

people

Use synonyms

were overwhelmed with daily routine

work

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which leads to restless life and

gradual

Correct article usage

a gradual

show examples

reduction

Change preposition

show examples

family interaction. Around 80% of

Add an article

the world

show examples

world

Change noun form

world's

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population wants dignity in profile at the time of retirement. The upcoming paragraph provided how it

impact

Correct subject-verb agreement

impacts

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individually

Replace the word

individuals

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and the way to overcome

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these issues. Nowadays, everyone running to carry forwards their wealth in

Correct article usage

the comings

show examples

comings

Change the noun form

coming

show examples

days to be

well developed

Add a hyphen

well-developed

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While

Linking Words

concentrating on growth,

people

Use synonyms

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

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forget about

health

Use synonyms

as well as

Linking Words

relationship.

For instance

Linking Words

, almost private companies

fetching

Wrong verb form

fetch

show examples

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
49
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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To conclude, many people are not getting the right amount of rest their body needs because they need to make a living and want to start their day early. As a result, not only their health is affected but also their relationships.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many modern children spend great deal of time sitting in front of a television or computer screen. This is exteremly harmful to their development. Therefore, parents should strictly limit the time that children spend in this way. To what extent do you agree or disgree?

In many countries schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Art is considered an important part of society as well as an expression of its culture .Do you think it is important for children to be taught art?Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on arts rather than other subject .

Some people says that it is a waste of public money to spend on cultural events, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion