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Band 5

People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kinds of problems can this cause? What solutions can you suggest?

#people #changes #lives #kinds
It is very obvious that
people
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 want
changes
 or
unwilling
Add a missing verb
are unwilling
show examples
 to make
changes
 in
there
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their
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 lives, because of many
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
,
However
, these problems need to
be solve
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be solved
show examples
 immediately because
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 can boost
peoples
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people's
show examples
confidence
. Many
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
, why
people
 don't want
changes
 nowadays,
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 maybe
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 are contented already
to
Change preposition
with
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there
Correct your spelling
their
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 lives or
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 are old to make
changes
,
For example
, when you are working in the Philippines, in one company you already working there for ten long years. And you are already forty years old. Some
people
 tend to stay in that company
due to
 the reason that in
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 mind
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 are old and there afraid to make
changes
 and transfer to another company.
In addition
, some factors
also
 that
i
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I
show examples
 think is
there
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their
show examples
 education, Maybe
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 have low education and no
self
Add a hyphen
self-confidence
show examples
confidence
 at all to try new skills and get out of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
comfort
zone
. If problems come
its
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
must have
Add a hyphen
must-have
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solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
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, I
wat
Correct your spelling
want
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 to suggest
this kind
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
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 of
people
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
get out of
there
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their
show examples
comfort
zone
 and try new skills, or if
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 have no formal education or maybe
there
Correct your spelling
they're
show examples
 old enough to go to
shool
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school
show examples
. Some
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
 offer some online schooling to the older ones to learn new skills and maybe go and study vocational courses to boost
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
confidence
 and more
oppurtunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 at work. I suggest
also
 that government and the authority should create a program and give counselling to these
people
 because
,
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apply
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its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
 big help to boost
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
confidence
 and get out of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
comfort
zone
. In conclusion, these problems have many solutions, though many
people
 don't want
changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 lives,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
if
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 help
themeselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
and maybe
listen
Add the preposition
tolisten
show examples
 some counselling it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
really can help
get
Correct pronoun usage
them get
show examples
out
Correct pronoun usage
them out
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 of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
comfort
zone
aand
Correct your spelling
and
 boost
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
confidence
.
Submitted by rubenellaurino on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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