The chart shows requests for information at a tourist office in the United Kingdom from January to June.

The chart shows requests for information at a tourist office in the United Kingdom from January to June.
The following graph illustrates the demand for data about tourist offices from January to June in the United Kingdom.
Overall
, it can be easily seen that the majority of people started to be interested in requesting information in
person
,
while
the distribution of letters or emails became low over time. To start with, in January all three different methods were below 1000,
thus
by telephone is the peak 900 requests.
Whereas
in
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
person
was the lowest with applications that were a little bit above 400. In the first month of the spring, requests by a
person
slightly overcame the requests by letter or email,
afterwards
Add a comma
,afterwards
show examples
in April it got significantly higher than by cellphone. Suddenly, at the start of June, application by a
person
is at
peak
Correct pronoun usage
their peak
show examples
which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
almost 2000, whilst the most unpopular was by letter and email, approximately 400, which decreased twice in comparison from the starting point of 800 or less. In conclusion, society started to use more in-
person
communication during the warm times,
while
during the cold
periods
Add a comma
,periods
show examples
people preferred requesting by phone.
Submitted by lil.abdulla on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words person with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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