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There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#pressure #people #subjects #education #cookery #school #syllabus #children #work
In
this
 modern era of rising societal standards, there has been an increase in stress among
students
due to
 extremely busy schedules, and I believe removing non-academic
subjects
 from
students
' timetables will improve their performance.
Strees
Correct your spelling
Streets
 have become a common phenomenon among
students
, unfortunately, and
this
 may manifest
due to
 the pressure to succeed academically, the challenge of managing their time between classes and extracurriculars, and the lack of support that many
students
 receive from teachers. and the solution to
this
 may be found in removing some non-academic
subjects
,
such
 as physical education
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because they do not contribute significantly to a student's academic success and they can prevent
students
 from giving their full attention to more effective
subjects
, which I mean more important
subjects
,
such
 as math and chemistry, which are difficult and time-consuming
subjects
 that have a greater impact on GPA than the others; by eliminating them,
students
 may have more time to focus on them. Some people may argue that removing non-academic
subjects
 may prevent
students
 from engaging in extracurricular activities, but in fact, it may help
students
 to involve in an interesting self-discovery journey by giving them the chance and time to discover the world outside of school hours and get themselves involved in voluntary work, which may improve their
overall
 knowledge and abilities and provide them with the opportunities to develop themselves in multiple directions. In conclusion, I stand by my belief that removing non-academic
subjects
 can reduce stress among
students
 and help them to perform better.
Submitted by talastring on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pressure
  • succeed
  • academically
  • non-academic
  • physical education
  • cookery
  • school syllabus
  • concentrate
  • academic work
  • well-rounded
  • enhancement
  • practical skills
  • balanced education system
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