More and more people today are drinking sugar based drinks. What are the reasons for this ? What are the solutions.

#people #sugar #drinks

There is no denying the fact that the main impact of unhealthy

drinks

is debatable.

While

it is a

commonly

Change the adverb

common

show examples

belief

Replace the word

believed

show examples

that unhealthy

drinks

high in sugars may put a negative impact on health. In

this

essay, I will give the reasons and the solutions to unhealthy

drinks

. There are several reasons that make unhealthy drinking highly popular.

Firstly

, the enormous advertisement campaign from

sugar

-drinking companies made teenagers become addicted to

such

drinks

For example

while

driving your car you will notice many advertisements about

sugar

drinks

Furthermore

, many media influencers have several advertised

sugar

drinks

and motivated

people

to buy them.

People

find it accessible everywhere they are able to buy it

as well as

Add a verb

isit

wasit

show examples

handy for kids as there is no age restriction on

sugar

drinks

Thus

this

makes it clear

such

advertisements can make

sugar

drinks

fast spread globally.

On the other hand

, there are certain solutions to drinking sugary

drinks

. Education is the main way to tackle

this

issue.

People

need to be aware of the effects so they can avoid the problem as they need to understand clearly the danger of sugary

drinks

on their health.

Furthermore

, the government must ban

such

advertising. The authority could

also

use infomercials to educate their citizens about the deteriorated negative effects of sugary

drinks

. In conclusion,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

sugary drink has increasingly spread among individuals.

This

is because of the excessive use of advertising for

such

drinks

. The authority must stop

such

advertising and prevent supermarkets to sell them.

Moreover

people

need to be educated about the problem of

such

drinks

on health.

Submitted by mgumssan on Sat Feb 25 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Many graduates want to start their first job in a big corporation. Many others prefer to work for a small company first. What are the different advantages in each decision?
Today, many graduates want to start their first job at a large corporation, while many others prefer to work for a small company first. These decisions each have their own benefits and this essay will discuss both perspectives.
5
band
Some people say that social media is a digital drug that has left many people addicted enhanced their lots of valuable time while others say social media has Enable Connectivity with the world. Discuss both views and give your opinion on the topic.
Social media has been bringing numerous benefits to individual's life in recent years. While some people believe that this novelty leads to waste of time for individuals, others advocate people may connect easily via social media. This essay will explain the both sides, and support idea of connection amongst people may support by social media.
7
band
In many countries, the cost of living is rising. What are the effects of this on individuals and society. Suggest solutions to this problem.
The expenditure for living is increasing significantly in many nations worldwide. There are several negative effects of this trend, including financial stress; luckily, this issue can be solved by some measures such as inflation control.
4
band
More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, overweight status become more popular all over the world. Everyone think high food prices will prevent this problems. In my opinon, there are more reasons lead to overweight of people.
7
band
Write a letter to your friend about a job opportunity you came across that they might find interesting. In your letter, you should: • give some details about the job • mention how you came across the job opportunity • explain why you feel the job would be suitable for your friend
Hope this letter finds you in radiant health and best of spirits. It’s been a long time since we met. I’m writing this letter to let you about a job vacancy which I saw in “The New York Times” newspaper yesterday.

More and more people today are drinking sugar based drinks. What are the reasons for this ? What are the solutions.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many graduates want to start their first job in a big corporation. Many others prefer to work for a small company first. What are the different advantages in each decision?

Some people say that social media is a digital drug that has left many people addicted enhanced their lots of valuable time while others say social media has Enable Connectivity with the world. Discuss both views and give your opinion on the topic.

In many countries, the cost of living is rising. What are the effects of this on individuals and society. Suggest solutions to this problem.

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to your friend about a job opportunity you came across that they might find interesting. In your letter, you should: • give some details about the job • mention how you came across the job opportunity • explain why you feel the job would be suitable for your friend