Computers are becoming an essential part of school lessons. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your own opinion.

Modern technology,
such
as
computers
are
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is
show examples
becoming an inseparable related section in primary education during lesson explanations. There exist both merits and demerits of
this
tendency and my strong belief is that there are more benefits rather than
drowbacks
Correct your spelling
drawbacks
. Using
computers
or laptops in lessons
is
Verb problem
does
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not with its disadvantages,
however
.
Firt
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First
of all, most pupils have well
internet
connection
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
laptops right now and
this
leads to copying the answers from the
Internet
medias
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media
show examples
easily.
As a result
,
student
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students
show examples
do not have to
foucus
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focus
on
theris
Correct your spelling
these
tasks in
details
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detail
show examples
on time, even
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
transfer self-study tasks from the
Internet
.
In addition
,
computers
affect
to
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apply
show examples
both students’ and teachers’ healthy
lifestyle
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lifestyles
show examples
.
For instance
, they
spent
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spend
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most time
on
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apply
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making presentations or doing homework
in
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on
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laptops and
this
causes
decline
Add an article
a decline
the decline
show examples
of
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in
show examples
eyesight
Correct pronoun usage
their eyesight
show examples
. There are numerous advantages of being
computers
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
of the educational system. To start with,
computers
and the
Internet
are the power of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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information to increase and gain new knowledge. In
this
case, we have an opportunity to learn more
thing
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things
show examples
which we can watch online explained lessons to prepare
exams
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for exams
show examples
in secondary education.
Furthermore
, we always cannot find paper books in libraries or shops even if we find them, their costs are sometimes exorbitant to buy them. Providing we have a laptop, we may upload everything
what
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that
show examples
we search from the
Internet
to a computer.
To conclude
, utilizing
the
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apply
show examples
computers
in school education is vital but, in my personal position
is that
Verb problem
,
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there are more beneficial sides than
ist bad
Verb problem
negative
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consequences.
Submitted by moxinurabjalilova on

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task response
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be further developed to provide a clearer overview of your main points and opinion. Your main points are somewhat supported, but the examples and explanations could be more relevant and comprehensive. Make sure to address the prompt fully and provide specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
You show some coherence and cohesion in your essay, but there are areas where the logical structure could be improved. Try to organize your ideas more clearly and use transition words to guide the reader through your argument. Additionally, work on developing a more coherent introduction and conclusion to frame your essay effectively.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Edutainment
  • Multimedia resources
  • E-learning platforms
  • Digital literacy
  • Cyberbullying
  • Ergonomic hazards
  • Cognitive overload
  • Technological proficiency
  • Blended learning environments
  • Instructional technology
  • Adaptive software
  • Screen time management
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