Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There is
am
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an
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opinion that celebrities
are
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who are
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known
as
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apply
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for glamour and wealth
are
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is
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famous
Correct quantifier usage
more famous
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than achieve.
While
Linking Words
a reckon that
this
Linking Words
is a bad
example
Use synonyms
for
Correct your spelling
young
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youngs
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young
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,I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others can occupy cool role models On the first hand, crucial meaning that many
people
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do achieve without really hard working for it.Lots
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people
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of people
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,who do not do
correct
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correctly
show examples
hard-working,can take significant
achieve
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achievements
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by
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through
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their
opportunity
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opportunities
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.They may be inherited
by
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apply
show examples
money from parents,married
to
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apply
show examples
eminent
partner
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partners
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,or
they
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apply
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may be
on
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in
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gossip journals on a really TV projects.
For
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example
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,
Antonela
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Antonella
Roccuzzo
who
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apply
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is
a
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the
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wife of legendary football player Lionel Messi.She is rich and
wife
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the wife
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of the most famous player in the world.
Antonelo
Correct your spelling
Antonello
goes to Messi's matches and morally
support
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supports
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him.They have
being
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been
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married since 2017.The wife of
football
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a football
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player became famous
by
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through
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her husband,but she did not exertion be herself.The allusion for young
people
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is that success can be achieved easily,and their projects and school works are not necessary for it
On the other hand
Linking Words
,there are as least as many examples
to
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of
show examples
role models
by
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apply
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hard
working
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work
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,whose accomplishments can be
glorious
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a glorious
show examples
Use synonyms
example
Fix the agreement mistake
examples
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for young
people
Use synonyms
.
Musician
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Musicians
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,athletes,actors and social media stars make considerable
achieve
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achievements
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only
by
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through
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their
really
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real
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diligence.They work for more than 5-6 hours per day for their target and in the
future
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,future
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they will get
resultat
Correct your spelling
results
of these
endeavor
Correct your spelling
endeavours
show examples
.
For
Linking Words
example
Use synonyms
,Will Smith.He is one of the most famous
people
Use synonyms
in the world.He tried to be
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
main roles and worked for
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
in the future.Nowadays,I believe that he earns millions of dollars lying at home being a celebrated and achieved actor.If the youth watch
connection
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the connection
show examples
between trying and success,they will want to start their programmes and projects for their goal.Because,in my
opinion
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,opinion
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that
this
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type of celebrated
talents
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talent
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can pull youth to the good side In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
I recommend everybody to try to do for achieve ,who knows, maybe you can too?
Submitted by 29th of april on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
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