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Band 1

communications between managers and workers are important, other people said that other factors are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#communications #managers #workers #people #factors
On the first
hand
Add a comma
,hand
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 we have
safely
Change the adverb
safe
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 transport, which practice by humanity
many
Change preposition
for many
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 years and which
transformation
Replace the word
transformed
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 from early rank our history,
history
Correct article usage
the history
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 of
first
Correct article usage
the first
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 people on Earth
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because we want to ride speedily and want to transfer even more things and only
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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 can use for these goals.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
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 four wheels
is
Change the verb form
are
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 banal and your brain craves more extreme, more knifelike feels, which never happened with cars,
therefore
 we
has
Change the verb form
have
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 constructed
motorcycle
Correct article usage
a motorcycle
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. Again all stopped on our visibility on life, on your requirements, because
the
Correct article usage
apply
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first society
nuts
Add a missing verb
is nuts
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 about risks and some kind of separation from reality, and second society love measured, calm. If I
going
Wrong verb form
go
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 to some places,
then
 I would take the car, because long travel in
Add an article
the mountain
a mountain
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mountain
Fix the agreement mistake
mountains
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 and other
hard to reach
Add a hyphen
hard-to-reach
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 corners of the world is my all, and
motorcycle
Correct article usage
a motorcycle
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 absolutely will not fit.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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