IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always good. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #lives #change
Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others,
however
, think that change is always good. Discuss both views and give your opinion. In the contemporary world, there are certain lifestyles where, some individuals prefer to live their
life
 without any change,
in
contrast
Add the comma(s)
,contrast
show examples
 others would rather have a diverse mode of
life
. In my way of thinking, I am in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of trying
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
cutting-edge things in order to progress and learn more.
To begin
 with, experiencing alteration is
inevitable
Add an article
an inevitable
show examples
 process throughout the whole
life
.
However
, there are a proportion of inhabitants, who
are not adopt
Change the verb form
are not adopting
show examples
 any
hugely
Change the adverb
huge
show examples
 changes
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and prefer to stay in their comfort zone, to have a
similarly
Replace the word
similar
show examples
 daily routine. there might be
advance
Add an article
the advance
an advance
show examples
 of frustration belong with adjustment to new conditions. To illustrate,
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
might be promoted and move to
other city
Change the wording
another city
other cities
show examples
. Adapting to recent coworkers,
environment
Correct word choice
and environment
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 some
human-beings
Correct your spelling
human beings
show examples
 might be arduous, and lead to stress.
Although
advance
Add an article
the advance
show examples
 of cycle daily
succor
Change the spelling
succour
show examples
 to sharpen skills and bring confidence in that specific procedure.
Conversely
, everything
what
Change the word
that
show examples
 we have now, and will have in the future result
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
evolve
Replace the word
evolution
show examples
 and progress, which needed constant changes
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in our mindsets,
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in transition
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overall
. New discoveries
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 possibility to lead to broaden horizon, encounter with the claim, that everything is possible.
For instance
, one decade before, no one believed
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 electric vehicles aside from Elon Mask. After his creation, all human beings
convinced
Add a missing verb
were convinced
show examples
, and start to manufacture them
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 fabric. In a nutshell, some residents
satisfied
Add a missing verb
are satisfied
show examples
 with their simple and comfortable
life
,
therefore
, avoiding any alterations.
However
, for modernization, it is necessary to recognize and promote new amendments.
Submitted by zarina.dalabayeva on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: