IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many doctors recommend that older people exercise regularly,but most patients do not follow an exercise routine. Why do you think this happens? How can people be encouraged to exercise regularly?

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According to
Linking Words
doctors
Change noun form
doctors'
doctor's
show examples
 advice those
people
Use synonyms
 who are belonging to old ages they should have to do
exercise
Use synonyms
 in
daily
Correct pronoun usage
their daily
show examples
 routine and most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 who are suffering from
many
Correct your spelling
any
show examples
type
Change to a plural noun
types
show examples
 of diseases
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do not follow to do morning walking jogging or running on
daily
Add an article
a daily
show examples
basis
Use synonyms
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss more in
Linking Words
further
Add an article
the further
a further
show examples
 essay. In my point of view those
people
Use synonyms
 who are suffering from diseases and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
shouldn't give time to properly
jym
Correct your spelling
gym
 because old
people
Use synonyms
 have weak bones and they think about that when they run if any incident became with them they think that the bones are
crack
Wrong verb form
cracked
show examples
.That type of public need help from others
however
Linking Words
 when
take
Change the verb form
taking
show examples
 a rest
onbed
Correct your spelling
on bed
 without movement most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 facing problem
according to
Linking Words
 their health
such
Linking Words
 as blood circulation and clotting.In
additional
Replace the word
addition
show examples
 elderly
people
Use synonyms
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lack of facilities to give time on
regular
Add an article
a regular
show examples
basis
Use synonyms
 on routine because it is very necessary from them to maintain physical health. We encourage them very easily
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
show examples
 a good platform and guide them
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 benefits of
exercise
Use synonyms
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should have to give facilities at home they should provide them
Change preposition
with
show examples
jym
Correct your spelling
gym
machineswhere
Correct your spelling
machines where
machine where
 they want and
also
Linking Words
 organise
compaigns
Correct your spelling
campaigns
 home
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 home regarding health because most of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
unware
Correct your spelling
unaware
show examples
 of
exercise
Use synonyms
 and need awareness about
this
Linking Words
hence
Linking Words
athorities
Correct your spelling
authorities
 have should encourage them by a starting program and they guide them in
easy
Change the article
an easy
show examples
 way about the benefits of gym. In conclusion,
Although
Linking Words
 most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
patients are ignoring the morning walk daily
basis
Use synonyms
 they give
Correct pronoun usage
it important
show examples
important
Replace the word
importance
show examples
 to take rest
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
bed
Add an article
the bed
a bed
show examples
.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think daily
basis
Use synonyms
exercise
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 very important for old age
people
Use synonyms
 and patient for their fitness.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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