Some people say that parents should place restrictions on the hours of their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is always said that parents should encourage children to read
books
rather than
watching
Wrong verb form
watch
show examples
TV
and playing
computer
games. I think
this
statement is right , reading
books
has more
benifit
Correct your spelling
benefit
benefits
instead
of watching
TV
. To
beging
Correct your spelling
begin
with, why
people
Add a missing verb
do people
show examples
prefer
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reading
Change the form of the verb
read
show examples
books
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
First of all
TV
and
computer
display spread
altraviolet
Correct your spelling
ultraviolet
rays which
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
a dangerous impact on human eyes but on other hand reading
books
not only provide knowledge but
also
a
Change the article
an
show examples
ocean of vocabulary words which one can implement throughout writing or speaking and can make
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
better communication way.
Secondly
,
books
provide authentic knowledge which one can not challenge because
verfied
Correct your spelling
verified
by
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
,
thus
, people always get
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
information which has not any risk
while
implying in life work.
Moreover
, nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
children
Add an article
the children
show examples
has become lazy and
eaisly
Correct your spelling
easily
get bored because of using other
technologc
Correct your spelling
technology
technologic
gadgets but
books
will again connect them hardworking lifestyle and may increase their sitting habit which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
very
mecessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
in
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
field.
On the other hand
, in
this
era of technology, children have to connect with technological knowledge so
Tv
and
computer
games provide them
Add the preposition
with these
show examples
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
of information and
also
sharp
Replace the word
sharpen
show examples
their
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
owing to
difficult
Add an article
the difficult
show examples
level of games. To recapitulate ,
although
,
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
and
tv
help
childeren
Correct your spelling
children
to
sharp
Replace the word
sharpen
show examples
their mental skills
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
books
provide them
verified
Change preposition
with verified
show examples
and
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
information.
Submitted by raiinderdeep on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Screen time
  • Attention span
  • Academic performance
  • Physical exercise
  • Childhood obesity
  • Language skills
  • Creativity
  • Imagination
  • Empathy
  • Educational programs
  • Personal growth
  • Balanced approach
  • Interactive games
  • Media consumption
  • Self-regulation
  • Distractions
  • Technology-enhanced learning
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