Today, TV channels broadcast man’s sport shows more than women’s sport shows. Why? Should TV channels give equal showtime for women’s sport and men’s sport?

#tv #channels #broadcast #man’s #sport #women’s #showtime #men’s

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There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over the fact that the amount of showtime spent to broadcast male

Use synonyms

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

than its

counterpart

Fix the agreement mistake

counterparts

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this

Linking Words

day and age. In my opinion, I would contend that showtime should be given for both genders’

Use synonyms

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

equally on television channels. Without a shadow of a doubt

that

Correct word choice

apply

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, almost all TV producers have a tendency to prioritise men’s

sport

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This

Linking Words

may be

due to

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the fact that showing male

sports

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can attract more profits and investments.

For instance

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, each Vietnamese men’s football match appeals

millions

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to millions

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of spectators and audiences from all over the country to cheer them either at the stadium or through the screen. They

also

Linking Words

gain ample contracts of promotions which are advertised on billboards everywhere in the nation.

Hence

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, television producers will earn more revenue when broadcasting male

sports

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While

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the redeeming feature of showing men’s

sport

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is widely acknowledged, it is unfair if that of its counterpart is neglected.

Although

Linking Words

male athletes attract huge amounts of profits, the reputation of female

sports

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is increasing, which

also

Linking Words

appeals to a wealth of attractions for the time being.

For example

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, there are more

sports

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for women in numerous well-known competitions

such

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AFC

Correct article usage

the AFC

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Cup in

Asian

Correct your spelling

Asia

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which organised female football tournaments.

Thus

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, more women’s

sports

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should be broadcast on television. In conclusion, it is doubtless to say that male

sports

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are more popular and gain a lot of revenue,

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however

Add a comma

however,

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sports

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which are played by female athletes should be given equal showtime on the screen.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Mon Mar 06 2023

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Task Achievement

Your essay clearly addresses the topic, yet it could benefit from greater depth in explaining the reasons behind the current broadcasting preferences and offering a more balanced argument for equal showtime. Try to delve deeper into both sides of the argument to enrich your task response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The structure of your essay is generally clear. Still, the flow between ideas and paragraphs can be enhanced. Using a wider range of linking phrases and making sure each paragraph clearly leads into the next could improve the overall cohesion and coherence of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Today, TV channels broadcast man’s sport shows more than women’s sport shows. Why? Should TV channels give equal showtime for women’s sport and men’s sport?

Your opinion

In spite of technological developments in transportation, many people believe that a bicycle is the best way to reach in any destination. What are the advantages and disadvantages of using a bicycle nowadays?

Some people think that newcomer should follow the rules of the new country while others believe they should keep their own customs.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that certain old building should be preserved more than others. What types of old buildings should be preserved? Do you think of the advantages of preserving old buildings outweigh the disadvantages?