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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours of sunshine per year in three major cities. Summarize this information by selecting and reporting the main feautures and make comparison where relevant.

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours of sunshine per year in three major cities. Summarize this information by selecting and reporting the main feautures and make comparison where relevant.
#show #temperatures #hours #sunshine #year #three #cities #information #feautures #comparison
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The graph and table chart depicts, the climate and duration of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in the three main towns
such
Linking Words
 as
London
Use synonyms
, New
York
Use synonyms
, and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 per year.
Overall
Linking Words
, yearly, the hours of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in New
York
Use synonyms
 and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 are almost similar.
London
Use synonyms
 has
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 hours of
sunshine
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 the table chart.
While
Linking Words
 in the winter ,season new
york
Use synonyms
 and
London
Use synonyms
 show their temperatures drastically decrease during January month, as per the line graph.
To begin
Linking Words
 ,
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
Sydney
Use synonyms
, Climate in January is above 25 degrees. ,
Linking Words
However
Add the comma(s)
,However
show examples
Sydney
Use synonyms
 and
London
Use synonyms
, is showing below 10
degree
Change to a plural noun
degrees
show examples
 in the winter season.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
 duration of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in
London
Use synonyms
 falls at 1,180 hrs and New
york
Use synonyms
 and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 have nearly 100 hrs difference
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is 2,535 and 2473 respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the peak
of
Change preposition
apply
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temperature is on month
july
Change the capitalization
July
show examples
 and the climate of new
york
Use synonyms
 and
London
Use synonyms
 comes near to 30 degrees
celcious
Correct your spelling
celsius
.
Linking Words
Consequently
Add a comma
,Consequently
show examples
 the temperature
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Sydney
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
july
Change the capitalization
July
show examples
will drop down to 15
degree
Change to a plural noun
degrees
show examples
.
On
Change preposition
At
show examples
 the end of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 year again new
york
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
london
Change the capitalization
London
show examples
 reach
belwon
Correct your spelling
between
below
 10 and vice vasa
Use synonyms
sydney
Change the capitalization
Sydney
show examples
 reach 25
degree
Change to a plural noun
degrees
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
december
Change the capitalization
December
show examples
 month
Submitted by anjualex444 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sunshine, london, york, sydney with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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