the chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habit in five Australian cities.

the chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habit in five Australian cities.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given chart illustrates the results of the survey about people's
coffee
Use synonyms
and tea buying in five Australian cities.
Overall
Linking Words
, the maximum percentage is 63% which prefers to drink
coffee
Use synonyms
, especially in Melbourne and Hobart. The minimum percentage is about 35% which prefers to buy fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
, especially in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the first
place
Use synonyms
is going to a cafe for
coffee
Use synonyms
and tea is 63% in Melbourne and Hobart. The second
place
Use synonyms
is 56% in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
. And the
last
Linking Words
place
Use synonyms
is 56% and under 50% in order in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
and Adelaide.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the maximum for buying
coffee
Use synonyms
is 54% in Hobart and
Brisbane
Use synonyms
. The second
place
Use synonyms
is 50% in Adelaide. And the rest are similar to each other. The
last
Linking Words
one is buying fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
. The first
place
Use synonyms
is 43% in Sydney and the second
place
Use synonyms
is 42% in Melbourne and the
last
Linking Words
place
Use synonyms
is under 35% in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
and Adelaide.
Submitted by Niyoshakhalili on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, brisbane, place with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: