The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

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The charts illustrate data about online shopping

sales

Use synonyms

in New Zealand in both 2003 and 2013.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be seen that in 2003, the travel sector had the greatest

percentage

Use synonyms

of online

sales

Use synonyms

, but in 2013, it experienced a decrease of 29%. All categories showed changes in their

percentage

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of online

sales

Use synonyms

over the years. Taking a closer look, in 2003, clothes had the second-highest

percentage

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of online

sales

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at 24%.

However

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, film and music accounted for 21%, which was a very similar result. In 2013, the

sales

Use synonyms

of books increased slightly, reaching 22%.

This

Linking Words

rise

also

Linking Words

happened in the sector of film and music, which increased by more than 10% in their online

sales

Use synonyms

in New Zealand. Unfortunately, the sector of clothes

also

Linking Words

experienced a decline in 2013, losing almost 10% of its

sales

Use synonyms

, dropping from 24% to 16%. Travel online

sales

Use synonyms

reached their peak at 36% in 2003, which was the highest

percentage

Use synonyms

in both pie charts."

robertasottile.rbstSun Mar 12 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, percentage with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

160 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Comparative analysis
E-commerce
Retail sectors
Growth rate
Decade
Decline
Trends
Online transactions
Consumer behavior
Market share
Significant increase/decrease
Digital era
Accessibility
User-friendly platform
Market dynamics
Predictive outlook

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The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communicatio outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people think that cars should be banned from city centers to reduce pollution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You recently moved to a new area. Write to your friend and say - Why did you move there - Describe the new place - Invite him/her to visit you