Nowadays, more people are spending less time at home. Why do you think this happens? What effect does this have on individuals and society?

#people #time #home #effect #individuals #society

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In the advanced era that started at the beginning of

Correct your spelling

the 21st

century, both workers and students have tight schedules leading them to stay longer out of their homes.

Such

Linking Words

an effect of too seldom spent time at

home

Use synonyms

may bring less care to

people

Use synonyms

in their housing, including their family, and possibly unrecognize or not know each other's names between neighbours.

To begin

Linking Words

with, adults are more concerned about many lucrative activities to fulfil their needs. Consecuentively, undertaking those jobs

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

extra time and stipulates them to consent to their family to become late at

home

Use synonyms

Besides

Linking Words

adult person, adolescent

also

Linking Words

has to spend more in their academy because of either additional classes or extracurricular. Joining

English

Correct article usage

the English

show examples

Club after class,

for instance

Linking Words

, stipulates them to unable to go

home

Use synonyms

early,

moreover

Linking Words

when faced with competition within a week ahead. Some effects may occur

due to

Linking Words

the millennial busy culture.

As a consequence

Linking Words

of being busy,

people

Use synonyms

may achieve what they want but sometimes followed by some undesirable effects. The possible outcome is uncaring for the

people

Use synonyms

in their residential area.

For example

Linking Words

, when a student goes to

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

school in the early morning and comes

home

Use synonyms

late, it is hard for them to interact with their relatives, and even more difficult for their neighbours.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they will not know each name if no meeting between them. The social environment is going to be silent, with no neighbourhood bond activities because of busy with each other.

To conclude

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, there are some causes affecting

people

Use synonyms

to spend less time at their house because of outer-

home

Use synonyms

activities, either work or study culture. Those human choices obviously may result in a positive output for each individual, but sometimes affect them to become un-care with the neighbourhood. Even worse, they potentially do not recognize the name of the housing member.

Submitted by rizkibagus23 on Wed Mar 15 2023

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extended

Task Response: The essay partially addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons for people spending less time at home and the effects on individuals and society. However, the essay lacks depth and fails to fully develop the ideas.

extended

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay shows some coherence and cohesion by using linking words and attempting to structure the arguments. However, there are errors in logical structure, lack of clear introduction and conclusion, and insufficient development of main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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Nowadays, more people are spending less time at home. Why do you think this happens? What effect does this have on individuals and society?

Your opinion

governments in many countries are urgently seeking Ways to reduce unemployment in rural areas. what which are the most effective ways to do this? measure do you think would be the single mast effective step that governments could take? .!

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because we see the same TV shows, advertisements, fashion and follow the same brands. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?