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Band 5

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children.

People who obtain how to behave properly at the very beginning of their
ages
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age
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 easily fit into society rather than others. Acquiring behaviours’ outcomes, mostly affect attitudes that are associated with it;
however
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,
punishment
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 for unacceptable ones could create a reverse effect if it is used unnecessarily or excessively
way
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, so teaching the right is a long
way
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. Caregivers and tutors should focus on how can children acquire autonomous
and
Correct word choice
apply
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reasoning skills for their behaviours and consequences rather than immediately punishing unwanted behaviours.
Use synonyms
Punishment
Correct article usage
The punishment
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 phenomenon is most likely to be misunderstood by everyone. 
Punishment
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 is simply referred to
Change preposition
as a
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
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 suppression of
unwanted
Correct article usage
an unwanted
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situation
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situations
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, it does not have to be a physical
one
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.
Nevertheless
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, it
is result
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results
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 in
from
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apply
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emotional abuse to physical
one
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 that damage
on
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to
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 children’s
life
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lives
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, because of its exploitable nature. People taking benefit from
to oppress
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oppressing
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 child, who is different
than
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from
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 others, do not care
the
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about the
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children
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child's
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 well-being.
Punishment
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 should be fair for anyone who is received,
that is
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 the critical line for
punishment
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 to torture.
Parents
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 and teachers do not
raised
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raise
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 of being aware of the penalty’s structure,
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is why it can aggravate the child’s future in a perennial
way
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. Research is shown kids who have been exposed the
punishment
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especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
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 the abusive
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one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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, have
more
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a more
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 likely shrunken
brain
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brains
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 and not a functional
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one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
show examples
. Caregivers and tutors, who are taught well, should be permitted to raise kids, regarding
punishment
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 usage.
Punishment
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 could be used in an effective
way
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, for kids to make them understand their behaviours' consequences. If teachers or
parents
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 use it more than once and for nothing, a child could develop resilience for that
punishment
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. Owing
to
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apply
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, someone who is in the authority should know its power on pupils, using different approaches for raising them in a good manner. A child who is in a learning phase can easily internalize others’
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 and
this
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 knowledge could lead to
parents
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 or tutors
for
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apply
show examples
being
a good role models
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good role model
good role models
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 to them. They can create an equal environment for childs’
process
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processes
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 and give them comprehensible
punishment
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 for their
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
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 like repetitive and unmanageable conditions, they might use
time-out
Correct article usage
a time-out
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 technic
that is
Linking Words
 taking them out of the games or activities that children like. In conclusion, I’m an opponent of the
punishment
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 because of its notion that can be abused, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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guardians
such
Linking Words
 as
parents
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 of
Add an article
the tutor
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tutor
Fix the agreement mistake
tutors
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 should be aware of the technics that are non-violence for
realization
Add an article
the realization
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 of their actions whether its good or not.

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Your opinion

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