Some people think competitive sport is important for a child's education. Others think it has negative effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Competition in
sports
plays an important role in
children
's education.Few people argue that competitive
sports
activities
are vital for
kids
Change noun form
kids'
kid's
show examples
academic careers.
While
others say that has some disadvantages for school-going
children
.in
this
essay
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will discuss both points of view and give the reason why I believe that
sports
are essential for
children
.
To begin
with,a group of people argue that including
sports
in school will have many advantages for an heir who participates actively in competition.the first and foremost benefit is that the pupil can have a healthy physical and emotional aspect in their body.
For instance
,nowadays everybody loves to eat fast food and carbonated drinks rather than eating at home which can lead to major health issues.
While
participating in competitive
sports
activities
scion can prevent obesity which may cause major chronic diseases.
moreover
,
children
who are actively participating in
such
types of physical
activities
can have an improved social identity and adjustments among others by working as a team.
However
, few people say that competitive
sports
activities
can make a negative effect on younger
children
because
,
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apply
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they have a thought of fear about their
children
may get injured .
Moreover
, in some cases, these
sports
will demand more time for training because of which parents think that it may affect their
children
"s studies.
To sum up
,having all
substantial
Correct article usage
the substantial
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arguments,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe that
sports
are important for
children
"s development.Personally, I believe that competition in schools brings more advantages than getting harm.Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
sports
are necessary
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the age of a teenager in order to study,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
competitions are more vital,as it helps to find the ability of offspring.
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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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