IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information, so there is no need for printed books, magazines and newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

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In recent years, there are many people prefer to use computers and electrical devices to access information,
instead
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 of printing report, magazines and newspapers. I agree that electronic devices will help
the
Correct article usage
apply
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mankind to explore something
that is
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 useful for them.
However
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, I believe there is a bad side to
this
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 habit.
This
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 essay will explain both perspectives views. On one hand, there are communities that agree
by
Change preposition
that
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 using electronic applications can support the fast mobility of spreading the news. The society
also
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 stated
by
Change preposition
that
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 reading some columns in the automatic devices will help them to know
further
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 about the newest information.
Moreover
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, there are
also
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 columns to give the reader's opinions about the pros and cons of the news.
This
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 practical style is known and popular in modern cities around the world.
For example
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, the survey in the advanced cities stipulated that 90% of workers who work in the cities always carry their phone as the windows of information rather than bringing some book or magazines because it is not practical to use and is out of date.
On the other hand
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, it is fully understood that magazines, books and newspapers used to be called the main knowledge of the world in the 2000s era.
Therefore
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, families who reached the peak age believe that the population should bring reports and newsletters because it is more comfortable to read, and
also
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 the reader focus on the main topic,
instead
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 of reading some news on their machinery. In conclusion, in the modern world, electronic material will be a new window of advice.
However
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, some communities still believe that books, newspapers or journals still be the main part of it.

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Task Response
Ensure that the essay addresses all parts of the question thoroughly and provides a clear opinion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize the essay in a more coherent manner, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic and that there is a strong connection between ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital revolution
  • Immediate access
  • Interactive content
  • Multimedia elements
  • Enriched learning experience
  • Environmental considerations
  • Deforestation
  • Pollution
  • Tactile experience
  • Cognitive understanding
  • Retention
  • Technological dependency
  • Power outages
  • Remote locations
  • Tangible form
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