The chart below shows the amount spent on six consumer goods in four European countries.

The chart below shows the amount spent on six consumer goods in four European   countries.
The bar chart compares consumer spending on
six
different items in Germany, Italy, France and Britain.
It is clear that
British
people
spent significantly more money than
people
in the other three countries on all
six
goods. Of the
six
items, consumers spent the most money on photographic film.
People
in Britain spent just over £170,000 on photographic film, which is the highest
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
figure
is
Unnecessary verb
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shown on the chart.
By contrast
, Germans were the lowest
overall
spenders, with roughly the same figures (just under £150,000) for each of the
six
products. The figures for spending on toys were the same in both France and Italy, at nearly £160,000.
However
, French
people
spent more than Italians on photographic film and CDs, Italians paid
out
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more for personal stereos, tennis racquets and perfumes. The amount spent by French
people
on tennis racquets, around £145,000, is the lowest the figure is shown on the chart.
Submitted by tjumagul67 on

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words six, people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
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