IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1

The plans below show a public park when it was first opened in 1920 and the same park today

#plans #show #park #first
The given map illustrated a public
park
 in modern
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 and when it first opened in 1920.
Overall
 it can be clearly seen from the given map that the
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 a lot of changes.
Firstly
, in 1920 east part of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
park
 was more different than today. Rose
garden
 which
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 in the
north east
Correct your spelling
northeast
show examples
 part of
park
Add an article
the park
show examples
 was
removement
Correct your spelling
movement
.
Instead
 of
this
 their built cafe.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
Fonds
Correct your spelling
Ponds
show examples
 for water plants
demolished
Add a missing verb
were demolished
show examples
 and now there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 children's play
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
Thirdly
 seats and Glasshouse which
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 in the southeast part of
park
Add an article
the park
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 destroyed and there was built water feature.
In contrast
,
Rose
Correct article usage
the Rose
show examples
garden
 in
northwest
Correct article usage
the northwest
show examples
 didn't change. Their removed three seats,
Rose
Correct article usage
a Rose
show examples
garden
 in
Add an article
the south
show examples
south west
Add a hyphen
south-west
show examples
,
stage
Correct article usage
a stage
show examples
 for musicians and
instead
 of
this
 built
Correct article usage
an amphithealthe
show examples
amphithealthe
Correct your spelling
amphitheatre
 for concerts. And Fountain
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 was in
centre
Add an article
the centre
show examples
 their destroyed and replaced Rose
garden
 and 4 seats which
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 demolished
Submitted by araika.nk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • recreational facilities
  • landscaping
  • naturalistic
  • amenities
  • formal gardens
  • ergonomic
  • symmetric designs
  • inclusive
  • accessible
  • accommodations
  • native plant species
  • societal changes
  • visitor services
  • community events
  • evolution
  • modern playgrounds
  • wildflower meadows
What to do next:
Look at other essays: