IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Nowadays people are moving to urban areas from rural areas what are the reason and what problem can cause

#people #areas #reason
Nowadays villagers are moving to urban
areas
 because of modern facilities and to have career increased but
due to
 these urban
areas
Add a comma
,areas
show examples
people
 face
problems
. On the one hand, in our modern ,era there are many internet sources like mobile phones, personal computers, and laptops from which mobile phones are commonly used by everyone even in
villag
Correct your spelling
village
areas
.
People
 from rural
areas
 are taking advantage of these sources and getting to know about everything which can be useful for them. For ,instance Compared literacy rate of the olden days in rural
areas
 has been increasing day by day.
People
 are getting educated and doing respected jobs, hospitals, and schools in urban
areas
 to have a better life. To develop and find a good job,
people
 move to metropolitan
areas
, as well in search of amenities that they can not find in the countryside.
on the other hand
, population growth has been increasing rapidly and
this
 is outcoming many
problems
 like job
opportunities
 ,
accommodation
Correct word choice
and accommodation
show examples
. As we all know, India is a developing country and there are some
areas
 which are still under the development stage and
in addition
 to
this
 if the population goes on increasing there will be no good
opportunities
 will be left for the new generation. ,
Moreover
 many
people
 are already shifting abroad in order to grab
opportunities
 in other countries because there are no more great
opportunities
 left in their own country.
However
, govt should develop the rural
areas
 by setting up all facilities for
people
such
 as building hospitals, companies etc to overcome
such
problems
.
To sum up
 , By moving, villagers discover new
opportunities
, but
this
 can lead to
problems
 in the metropolis
Submitted by bolat.01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: