In some countries, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this messages?

Children are being taught in some countries that hard
work
pays off .I believe in those words even though children aren't needed smart , and hard
work
helps them to acquire
things
over some
time
. it withstands a long
time
compared to other people. some are against the statement here we discuss both . Children needn't be smart but they need to develop
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
persistence to acquire
things
.
for example
Edison developed the bulb after he failed in 1999 times .if we get the thing through hard
work
it will stand a long
time
compared to getting the thing the first
time
.For ,instance jeffbezos started amazon as a bookshop retailer online but over
time
it developed into online shopping and hold one of the successive companies in retail shopping .
to conclude
hard
work
helped them to withstand a position over a long
time
on the other hand
,some pupils are against hard
work
and they need an instant victory .the instant victory does not teach them to hold
things
over a long
time
because they do not know the patience to acquire the
things
.
for example
in the United States ,
American
Correct article usage
an American
show examples
driver got the price of 1 million dollars through the lottery but he wasted all the money unnecessarily. After 4year he returned back to his original
work
as a driver .
to conclude
without the patience to hold the thinks we dropped down to our original position
Submitted by srinivaskannan22 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: