Some people believe what children watch on TV influences their behavior. Some say it is the amount of time watching television that influences their behavior. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #tv #influences #behavior #say #amount #time #television

Lots of people think that

the

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apply

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watching

content can affect

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apply

show examples

the

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apply

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childrens'

Correct your spelling

children's

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behavior

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behaviour

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. Somebody's talk that the number of hours which the

child

spend for to show

can change their lifestyle.

This

essay

discuss

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discusses

show examples

about

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apply

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how the television plot and the time which had spent

for

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apply

show examples

watching

may

Unnecessary verb

apply

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effect

Replace the word

effective

show examples

child

. The

childs'

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child's

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brain

great

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greatly

show examples

adapted to

copy

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the copy

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information

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the information

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

see

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sees

show examples

This

reaction can change the mind of

young

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the young

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representative

Fix the agreement mistake

representatives

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. Nowadays,

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apply

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plenty of

programms

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

have

the

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apply

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scene of violence, sexual acts and terroristic acts which are not suitable for

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show examples

youngster.

Furthermore

, the content may

propagand

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propaganda

propagate

terrible things and manipulate the mind of

crowd

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the crowd

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This

condition

made

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is made

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by marketing managers which are used for their purposes.

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young age, these shows affect

dramatically

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them dramatically

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because their thinking and analytic skills are not

to develop

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developed

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clearly.

For instance

, in 2016

the

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apply

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most part of the pupils was

the

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apply

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victim of one show

which

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apply

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called "Blue Whale".

This

program was about suicide and being vandal.

Due to

this

the

amount

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number

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of suicides and acts of vandalism went up significantly. The number of minutes

which

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apply

show examples

used

Add a missing verb

is used

show examples

up to watching

border

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a border

the border

show examples

for

another helpful activities

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another helpful activity

other helpful activities

show examples

. Cartoons used a lot of specific tools for catching

attention

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the attention

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of the

child

Therefore

, the young generation

are

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show examples

not

Correct your spelling

too

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interest

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show examples

the

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apply

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other things. If scientists would make

statistic

Fix the agreement mistake

statistics

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about how many hours their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

had spent

for

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show examples

and how many hours they

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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spent in past

for

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show examples

this

, they will shock. Our ancestors

was

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were

show examples

healthy and

interesting

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more interesting

show examples

than us because they have

the

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apply

show examples

time for

active

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an active

show examples

hobby

such

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apply

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sport, art, and reading books. In comparison,

the

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apply

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entertainment has changed during

last

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the last

show examples

50 years. In conclusion, I think that our generation used up a

plathora

Correct your spelling

plethora

of time

for

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apply

show examples

watching

and in my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

it is not

normally

Replace the word

normal

show examples

for our life.

Submitted by xzibitabdu on Sun Mar 19 2023

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Your opinion

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
57Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

315 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe what children watch on TV influences their behavior. Some say it is the amount of time watching television that influences their behavior. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Some employees want to be able to contact their staff at all times, even on holidays. Does this development have more advantages than disadvantages?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People think that goverments should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve envinronmental problems. Give your opinion

obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem, and suggest some possible solutions.

Do you think consumers should avoid over packaged products or it is the responsibility of the producer to avoid extra packaging? Give your views or any relevant example with your own experience.